Christian Side Hug from The Fathers House on Vimeo.
A very rough estimate of the first few lines of the rap (not easy to transcribe/understand with all those sirens and shotguns in the background):
Gimme that christian side hug, that Christian Side hug. Gimme that Christian Side hug, that Christian side hug. I'm a rough rider teamed up with Christ. Gimme that Christian Side hug, that Christian side hug.These are the E-G rules, so pay attention cause this is essential. This ain't no front hug zone. Stop and listen. No front hugs and no kissin.
There is so much to say on this one. First of all, appropriation much?
Secondly, as Jill at Feministe asked, do you think they know what rough rider means?
In case you aren't already familiar with the Christian Side Hug, via The Sexist:
According to Stuff Christians Like, there's no "exact scripture reference" banning normal hugging. But the Side-Hug does significantly lower the "risk of two crotches touching," which has got to be in the Bible somewhere. Here's how you do it:"Instead of face to face, you go side to side, putting your arm around the person and your hip against their's. Still having a hard time mastering it? Pretend you're taking a photo and you're both looking at the camera together. The side hug, or A frame as it is also called, is safe for the whole family, friendly and above all holy."
If front hugging isn't Christian, I'm not sure how gunshots or cocking your gun are either (both can be heard in the background of the video).
The rap was performed at the Encounter Generation Conference (hence the EG reference in the lyrics) which is "a conference for youth, young adults, and youth pastors. Now is the time for them to bring the power, authenticity, and relevance of Jesus Christ to their culture."
At least we know these folks aren't ever making the crossover from Christian to mainstream rap anytime soon.
I grew up in a conservative Christian community/denomination, and I've never heard of this ridiculous "side hug" thing. We believed in front hugs.
I'm sick to death of these lunatic Christians giving everything who follows the teachings of Christ a bad name.
first thing I thought was "WTF"?
Second thing I thought is that they are looking at hugging all wrong.
I mean I thought that
hugging is the most pleasent
way of physically getting your
hearts closer and thus an expression
of love.
Love? Love is the pairing of one man and one woman for the sole purpose of creating little Christians to better solidify Jesus' voting block. That's in the Bible too...somewhere.
the Jesus voting block is not in the bible. Just because fundamentalists do things that you do not like does not mean that you get to condemn everyone within a certain religion. I will bring up Islam for an example. We all know that not muslims are terrorists, and not all Christians are bible thumping side hug loving crazies either.
things I find sad, yet also amusing: That's not an "A-frame" hug. An "A-Frame" hug is frontal, but where only your top halves lean towards each other, as if there's a small table between you. They can't even get the definition of a hug right.
Appropriate for the family? If you can't fully embrace a family member without chancing getting a woody, you need a psychiatrist.
and last but not least, I see a bit of irony in their saying a good Christian hugs in a manner that a lot of people feels to be rather insincere. Like a photo opportunity.
(sarcasm alert) Do tell, am I going to hell? I give my friends and family full-frontal hugs, but I'm not in the least amount turned on by it. Does that only get me to Purgatory?
"Appropriate for the family? If you can't fully embrace a family member without chancing getting a woody, you need a psychiatrist."
Exactly. My wife sees clients as a child and family therapist and this whole thing just sent my head spinning, asking what kind of environment these people come from that they automatically sexualize hugs between family members.
Damn!!!! I love the beat of this song!! But they are idiots!!! What's wrong with front hugs?
I hate when people want to rap because they think it's the fast train to hipness, but they don't have talent or imagination so they just repeat the same line over and over again.
Are you sure this isn't Christians making fun of themselves? I'm an evangelical feminist and StuffChristiansLike is a great website where Christians cheerfully mock themselves and each other. We do have a sense of humor, after all. The Side Hug article, which I've included here, is more mocking the practice rather than suggesting it, as it is surprisingly common (and awkward) in church settings.
http://stuffchristianslike.net/2008/04/106-the-side-hug/#idc-container
Please remember to think twice before generically criticizing evangelical Christians. Like all religions, there are more good eggs among us than bad.
Yeah, that's what struck me as well... this seems like the time-honored evangelical tradition of making yourself seem like the "cool" and "with it" youth pastor by poking playful (and good-natured) fun at the evangelical subculture. It's no substitute for the actual, real snark and derision (not to mention constructive criticism and critique from all sorts of progressive or radical lenses) that the evangelical subculture should endure, but to take this as a wholly-ingenuous song is also, I think, a bit wrong-headed. I honestly doubt that the people doing this rap really think that front-hugging isn't Christian; more that they're poking fun at their own subculture.
I think self-mockery is growing in the evangelical subculture, James, which is a healthy antidote to a group becoming pretentious or outdated. Obviously an ability to look honestly and humorously at one's own group is the sort of thing that increases slowly as younger generations start taking over church leadership. So, brace yourself to another ten years of bad rap spoofs. :)
but don't you know? all christians are assholes! every single christian is a sexist, racist bigot! at least that's how it feels on this blog. god forbid we ask for some freakin' nuance or sensitivity or respect.
in all of my church-going experience (presbyterian, unitarian and methodist), we give regular freakin' hugs. i must admit i do really light hugs or side hugs or just handshakes when it's someone i don't know well because i have space issues, but that's just me. and i know that with the sex scandal in the catholic church, many youth group leaders are very concerned about being suspected of anything untoward and therefore keep physical contact at a minimum.
having said that, this rap sucks.
I've been to church camps in the past that discouraged public displays of affection (PDA), and every year they'd hold a welcoming conference complete with some sort of slightly-too-long skit about how important it is to not hug your friends the wrong way, to not hold hands/kiss/etc. Understandably, we were there to learn about God, not to make out, but I always thought it was little reactionary that we couldn't do full frontal hugs.
No one is saying that all Christians are assholes. But some people are not the brightest bulbs, and sometimes they happen to be Christians. The kids in this video are examples of that. Other people who are suggesting that they are just poking fun at themselves are a lot more optimistic than I am, since I've seen crap like this done in person, straight faced.
actually you are completely incorrect. Every time someone of this blog admits to their faith they get chastised and ridiculed for daring to believe such a thing. Oh and then we get told that we aren't "real feminists" or that we are "bad feminists" because of it
Defend yourself, then. I haven't seen this happen, but I wasn't looking for it, either. But if someone calls you out on belonging to a religion that can easily be described a patriarchal, defend it. Show them how it isn't anti-feminist to be a Christian. Don't just say people are picking on you. Don't LET them pick on you.
you don't think I do? that's not the point. The point is that there are a lot of people on here who are very rude and very cruel to anyone who is a Christian. The point is that not all Christians are radical right wing extremists but nobody seems to get that point. And you don't see it happening because you don't want to see it. Every time someone says something that is pro-Christianity, even if its pointing out the fact that being a Christian and being a feminist are one in the same (God loves his children the same, both genders are seen equal to him), people on here get up in arms and proceed to demean everything that you have to say.
Yes, obviously I am purposefully ignoring any and all anti-Christian sentiments on this blog simply because I don't want to face it. Self-important, much?
I'm an atheist. I really don't give two shits about your religion. I don't think anyone should tear you down because of it, but I don't think that you're exempt from criticism either. Christianity is a religion that has been used for decades as a tool of oppression against women, that is a fact. So forgive us if we're a tad bit hostile towards it.
Regardless of whether or not Christians have been mocked on this blog before, this post is not mocking Christians as a whole. It's pointing out the absurdity of this particular group of kids.
why should she have to defend herself at all? because *other people* are not educated enough about christianity and its various denominations, schools of thought, philosophies, internal struggles, etc? that's not her problem. SHE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING OFFENSIVE.
and, yes, there is HUGE hostility to christianity on this board. most epitomized by courtney's post a couple of months ago about going to church, and her absolute utter SHOCK that THEY WEREN'T ALL ASSHOLES! MANY christian women and men on this board have discussed how their religion and their feminism intersect when discussing social issues, abortion, and on and on. these people have proven their commitment to feminism.
all i freakin' ask in return is the same basic respect we attempt to show to most other groups of people here.
I am not attacking your commitment to feminism. I am absolutely positive that it is possible to be a strong feminist AND a strong Christian.
But that doesn't negate the fact that Christianity has been used to oppress women for generations, and not all of us have quite gotten over that, yet.
Also, I never claimed that she said something offensive. But, as mentioned, a lot of people still connect Christianity strongly with patriarchal, puritanical oppression, even if every single member of the religion is not guilty of, and undeserving of, that connection. It has nothing to do with not being educated, it has to do with lifelong experience.
i understand that some people have bad experiences. really. i get it. and i get that there is a history of oppression. however, it's prejudicial to paint everyone with the same brush when one hasn't educated oneself about the changes going on in many churches/congregations/individuals. christianity is a big tent, and i deeply resent being made to answer for the actions of others with whom i have no contact, or having assumptions made about my intellect. BELIEVE ME, there are ***many*** christians who are keenly aware of the church's history and are trying to make changes *from the inside* to make a more just world. so to hear comments that are openly hostile to our religion rather than encouraging is, to my mind, really just about anger and isn't constructive in the slightest.
i'm remembering the community post in which the OP discussed her struggles reconciling her mormon faith and her feminism. commenters replied that "mormonism and feminism are complete opposites". one person wrote that she should "drop her faith like a cleveland steamer". NO ONE attempted to help her find ways to make her church more interested in women's issues, instead attacking her for her church membership. quite frankly, the fact that this sort of thing happens a LOT on this blog.
You can't expect non-christians to approve problems from a Christian point of view. It just doesn't work that way. I'd hazard a guess that the majority of commentors here are not very religious. So how exactly are we supposed to know how to reconcile feminism with a not-so-woman-friendly religion? However, since you are a Christian, you could offer advice coming for a point of view that the rest of us don't have, so then would have been a great time to speak up. And maybe you did.
first of all, you can stop calling it unfriendly to women. many mainline and liberal christian denominations and groups are specifically attempting to make reforms for gender/race/orientation equality and have been for decades. of course, there's always room for improvement.
second of all, if you don't have a freakin' suggestion, then don't freakin' say anything. maybe read and learn instead. i know some people have issues with their religious upbringing. hell, *I* have issues with my religious upbringing. this isn't the place to air my grievances against anyone that's done me wrong. (that's what my facebook status is for. ;)
i am asking for people of faith to be treated with the same basic respect that members of other groups are rightly accorded on this site.
I think it looks pretty obvious that there's no sense of irony to these guys. Also the references to no kissing make me think this is about christian unmarried couples and specific to abstinence. This is not self mockery.
Oh the misguidedness.... Not only do they not know what rough rider is but they don't even trust themselves to HUG normally lest they (oh the horror) get turned on! Then they might not be able to CONTROL themselves.
And the rap... oh the rap. Badly executed all white "ghetto-acting" guns and all. Not only is it eye roll worthy for the mere content of the rap but the notion that to be "cool" and "hip" with those young folk means they want to hear gun-shots and bad grammer (this ain't no... so does that mean it is?... I am confused now...). Please.
This is disrespectful to youth on SO MANY levels. But at least they keep it at their own conference. Eh.
This is SO true! Thank you for noting the utter offensiveness of this on so many levels -
first, the class/race issue here is repugnant - the "ghetto" acting white kids (all men but for one woman) in their hoodies with the gun shots, police sirens in the background to, apparently, amuse the crowd and create a more "authentic" air for their co-opted rap. The reason these sounds were originally produced within rap music was because of certain shared experiences among its listeners - it was a message and related to solidarity. The fact that these kids manipulate that shows exactly how insensitive and oblivious to that message they really are - instead of using their words and their christian love to help those different and underprivileged, they use their own privilege to mock the pain of others.
Second, the obvious sexism relayed within this 'message' is disgusting - as the men 'rap' about 'getting up off me' and 'that means you, too, girl' 'slow down mama' the obvious implication is that the girlfriend or other woman is trying to give a "front hug" in order to, what, tempt the man? It's so utterly offensive! Obviously, just like their short skirts, women's "front hugs" are just asking for 'it' - I mean, come on, it's obviously our (women's) fault that men jump us - we're tempting them and begging for it. Are men so utterly out of control of their own bodies that they cannot even suppress their desires, or is it just that their idea of desire at all is so evil that it must be eradicated at all costs?
On a side note - the democratic shift in the house? and, jesus never hugged 'nobody' like that? really??
I'm a rough rider teamed up with Christ.
I believe the line is actually:
“I’m a rough rider filled up with Christ’s love.”
Which, I think, is even more appropriate. lol
Are we sure this isn't a joke? That Washington City Paper article quotes stuffchristianslike.net--that's a joke site.
Even if it's real, I don't really see why it's worth drawing attention to except that it may be the worst rap ever performed, and that's a pretty competitive category.
This has got to be a joke or self-mockery. I've been a Christian group and the top-halve hug seems to be favored. As a matter of fact, there were quite a few of the air-cheek kisses. Some side hugs but only if you were greeting someone from behind or from the side, or if you were a teacher/older person greeting a student/child. And this was a group that had sleepovers discussing ways of "guarding your heart" and having dates with Christ and not slapping other people's knee. If the top-only hug was good enough for them, I'm pretty sure it's fine for quite a few.
And as for rough rider, I knew some Christians who did the Soldier Boy for a church function not knowing what it meant. As well as a few who have worn suggestive t-shirts/signs only to be shocked to find there was a double entendre ( "I can fill your whole" being one).
I front-hug friends, family members, and my significant other. Oh my, what a hussy I've been!
(I really hope this is a parody!)
So I feel the need to help us all out by getting this out of our heads:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Enr4W6FsSpk
Also, I sat and yelled "What the F***!" several times, as my roommate can attest.
Christians really do amuse me immensely. The most amusing thing is that people in this country see Muslim societies as more repressed. I spent a year in Kuwait and I can tell you that conservative Christians are much worse off.
Mixing of the sexes is discouraged in Kuwait, but they don't go to such absurd lengths to stop it. People greet each other with kisses there. Men and women. Every time I go there I kiss my friend's father's face in greeting.
According to this I'm a tramp.
"Mixing of the sexes is discouraged in Kuwait, but they don't go to such absurd lengths to stop it."
That doesn't make any sense. How can you discourage people of opposite sexes from being around each other in a completely reasonable fashion?
Believe it or not, some people don't like being told that their religion amuses people. Let's keep this a feminist blog, not just a general mockery of stereotypes and misinformation.
Not a joke.
Can we get a source on this? Stuffchristianslike is obviously a joke, which is the major citation.
I can't speak for the video but Stuff Christians Like isn't really a joke. It's a satire of Christian culture but written by a very devout Christian. He mocks the side-hugging, but only because it is such a huge thing in some Christian circles.
StuffChristiansLike isn't a joke, it's a satire? Is what you're trying to say, "it's not a joke because a Christian made it?"
I'll admit, I'm a recovering evangelical. And this made me laugh hysterically because I remember being instructed to do this! No joke! It's all about fear and avoidance, which is no way to live a life.
I sort of feel like this post isn't about feminism or women issues or abstinence only education even.
It's about making fun of evangelical Christians...which they may or may not be doing themselves. Pretty sure it's a parody!
Anyways, the post in general sort of seems demeaning and condescending about Christianity. And it's a blatant rip off from Feministe.
I don't see how it's a rip off from Feministe when they link to Feministe in the post. Also, this site and that site surely have a lot of the same readers, hence the same people sending tips as well, so it's not as though they each couldn't come upon it on their own.
I don't see many posts that are demeaning about Christianity. Plus, these people do not represent Christianity, only themselves and their personal interpretation of how much affection is allowed. Making fun of them is not making fun of Christianity. As a matter of fact, the only time the OP references Christianity in their own words is to say that if front hugs aren't okay then shooting probably isn't either (and I would add rough riding in many situations). It's a humorous post b/c of the way the rappers present themselves and the wording they use.
This may be just as funny as the Young Cons rap that I say posted here or on feministe. Not necessarily making fun of conservative ideology, just those particular people in that particular setting (horrible rap song). Just because you find something one set of Christians do interesting (especially seeing as how this is probably self-mockery, kinda like a skit that people put on to make fun of themselves or something only those in that community would get) doesn't mean you find Christianity funny or worthy of mockery. Just like laughing at people who say completely irrational things about homosexuality or sex education, mocking them doesn't mean you condemn their entire religion.
Also, I agree, it doesn't seem to have anything to do with feminism, abstinence-only education etc., but that hardly makes it demeaning. (Though, you could argue the feminism-relatedness comes from the fact it seems to promote a type of modesty/purity culture that is inherently more detrimental to women.And they do politicize it themselves which makes it more than about side hugs).
Methinks someone needs to read Romans 16:16! http://bible.cc/romans/16-16.htm
Honestly, we [Christians] are not all like this! Not even close! Please don't judge us all by a few deeply misguided folks!
You're complaining about appropriation? I must say that to the contrary, rap has been joyfully interpreted in a huge variety of settings internationally. One of the great things about music is its broad appeal, which leads precisely to its appropriation by diverse cultures in a way that smashes boundaries and makes the world smaller. No, the problem here, it seems to me, is more specific: that a musical tradition with a message and style that celebrate freedom seems to have been applied rather in bad faith, to support a message of repression. This is repression of girls, of the body, of teenagers, and of intimacy and self-expression.
I would also argue that it's a sign of conservative churches' fading appeal that they so frequently try to imitate the cultural forms innovated elsewhere in the culture in order to maintain their own relevance. They have some other things going for them, like tight-knit communities and the yearning for meaning that young, mid-life, and older people in different ways share urgently, and that secular culture in some ways neglects. But in other ways, as this video attests, there's a freedom in secular culture that has a -- dare I say it -- spiritual power of its own, which conservative evangelicals clearly envy, even as they fail to understand it.
My comment on love wasn't about gender bianary or hetrocentric.
I mean, there's no law that
says I cant hug a woman
nor did a make a statement suggesting a hetro relationship
I totally just had a Bible camp flash-back. In my youth, I attended dozens of camps and conferences with performances really similar to this one; the goal of all of them was pretty much what's stated in the article to show "relevance of Jesus Christ to [our] culture." The problem is that a rap about side-hugging is the opposite of relevance. Relevance doesn't mean cloaking every conservative Christian message in a robe of pop culture references -- it means recognizing real problems in our society (like hunger, discrimination, and poverty) and responding to those problems with love.
Performances like this one mostly just make me sad because it shows how many Christians have utterly and completely missed the point about cultural relevance.
"Rough rider?" Given the sexual practices of teens who take abstinence pledges, I think "barebacker" would be more accurate. Or better yet, saddlebacker.
IF this is a joke, and I'm not saying that it is or isn't, but IF it IS then Conservative Christians need a new way to laugh at them. Because this just isn't funny.
with regards to the lyrics:
"no kissin, i'm not afraid to call your momma, you'll end up in a coma" or something along those lines
i'm a bit confused. kissing doesn't result in comas, and so i'm wondering if the performer is suggesting violence?
As a christian, I think that the whole abstinence song thing is creepy!!!
I am a Christian and I believe that stuff like this is completely relevant to feminism.
A large part of feminism is seeking out and bringing to light the ridiculous social mores that make it such that we need feminists. This video is blatantly ridiculous and "phobic" on every level. One of feminism's many awesome qualities is to encourages women to embrace their sexuality as they see fit and not society.
This absolutely has to do with feminism and abstinence only education. The girls learning this at church(which they do - I was one of them)are next going to hear about abstinence only and how true love waits and how if they have sex they are tied to someone for LIFE and that sex cannot be just physical and anyone who tells them so is lying. That's what they hear. I promise you that and stuff like this is the precursor. I have no issue w/waiting for marriage and all that, but I believe it being passed as the only way is wrong.
This is truly a symptom of the issue that is abstinence only education today.
Jesus didn't die on the cross so we could give each other sorry-ass "side hugs."
Side hugs make Jesus sad. Give a poor soul a full hug!
Um, the video itself is not from "stuff christians like", it's from some user on vimeo named "the father's house" which doesn't sound satircal to me.
And, as a practicing christian, I'd like to defend feministing: Miriam isn't condemning christianity, but the use of Christianity as an excuse to promote prudish values.
As a Christo-Pagan, I'm disgusted and even offended by this—so apparently even a chaste expression of affection that's often reserved for family and friends is too sexual to be done correctly?! This BS is enough to give me a headache—probably from fighting back the urge to let my head repeatedly hit my desk. I'm more certain than ever that Jesus doesn't approve of a lot of what his followers get up to, especially when it involves the demonization of sex to the point where even the slightest expression of affection is seen as a dangerous incitement to lust, which already happens to be one of the Seven Deadly Sins.
*sigh* Why is it that the prudes, the racists, the homophobes, etc. get to give the rest of us a bad name? Every time something like this happens, it's very difficult for me to suppress the urge to say, "Sorry about that, folks—we're not all like that, I swear!" As you can probably imagine, my ultra-conservative cousins-in-faith are a continual source of embarrassment (and often irritation) to me, regardless of which denomination they come from.
Yes, it is real.
From Mother Jones:
"But consider the matter fact-checked: 'Mm-hm, that was us,' the Encounter Generation Conference secretary told me this morning. 'The side hug is just a little rule we have around here, to encourage kids to keep their hands off each other.'"
http://www.motherjones.com/riff/2009/11/best-abstinence-advice-ever
What is wrong with front hugging?