Within about five minutes of my appearance on O'Reilly airing last night, my inbox was flooded with all manner of baseless criticism and colorful commentary. I thought I'd share a few of my favorites, in the spirit of our long tradition of anti-feminist mail bag fun. Why would I ever assume that women get attacked for their appearances?:
Trigger Warning
Damn, you people are so full of crap, you don't know the difference between crap and good looks.
No one has mentioned your protruding Leno chin.
You are living proof of Limbaugh's Undeniable Truth of Life, #24; Feminism was established in order to allow unattractive women equal access to the mainstream. Proof? I love your juttting lower jaw and crooked face. You have a face for a writer.
You stupid fucking cunt. You're nothing but a shill for leftists and socialists. Feminism as practiced by the likes of you is nothing more than a means to gain access to the mainstream of society for and by ugly, loudmouthed bitches and lesbians that no one wants to be around. One of my jobs as a man is to protect (deserving) women. I would NOT protect you. In fact, I would toss you to the predators. I would trade you to the predators. I would betray you to the predators. I would NOT want you to pass on your weak genetics.
I am flabergasted [sic]. Were you born that retarded or do you take medication to achieve your level of retardation.
you libs are all alike, protect helen thomas and other lefties, shove your lib anti american agenda up our asses, and if you are a republican conservative woman, look out.. get a life, and by the way helen thomas the miserable witch is so off base, maybe she should just go away.
Oh us libs...always firing up those new-fangled computer doohickeys and charging good old boys with sexism.
After that idiotic remark you should be embarrassed to walk down the street in daylight! Please just go away and spare us all. Please! I beg you! Nobody with an IQ over 9 wants to hear anything you have to say. Ever! Please go away.......Please....
Wow, I feel like I really scared this guy.
Let me be the first (tonight) to criticize and make fun of your bushy eybrows [sic] and your underbite.
As to your statement to Mr. O'Reilly that "we all know what witches look like" I guess Cher, Susan Sarandon, and Michelle Pfeiffer should take great offense from your comment.
Can anyone explain this one to me?
Oh yeah, you'll never land a husband, either. Have a nice day.
Why thank you.
You must be a product of L. Johnson's GREAT SOCIETY ! ! ! !
Not that! Never that!
You young girls are so stupid I fear for the nation.
Imagine how fearful this dude would be if came over and read all the young girls flapping their gums over at feministing.
Bill O'reiley should have spanked you on his show.
You lousy cunt!
The scales on your eyes must look like barnacles. When first hearing you talk on the O'reilly show I thought the poking fun at someones voice should have been directed at yours since it was akin to a screechy mouse....You are burning and don't even know it!!! Look it up Remember, the burning will only feel like an eternity....
You gotta give the guy points for creativity and poetics.
go fuck yourself. best regards, david smith
Best regards to you too, fuckface.
I'll let discretion be the better part of valour rather than comment on your physical appearance...
The chivalry is much appreciated Sir.
Hey Thin Lips -
You are a typical feminist, very possibly a dyke, and (predictably) you totally lack a sense of humor. But don't worry, sweetie, you'll find a husband/wife eventually. There's gotta someone out there who will find you attractive.
Doug
Ah, thanks Doug. That's awful sweet of you.
I have four daughters about your age and they are all professionals. I would be devastated if any one of them turned out to be like you. You parents must be ashamed to admit to your apparent idiosyncrasies with their friends, relatives and neighbors. If you were my daughter, you'd be out of the will in a flash.
Sent this one directly to my deeply ashamed mother and father.
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While I respect your bravery, tenacity, and right to air stuff like this, and I also acknowledge the myriad of legitimate reasons to do so...
I have to admit that these posts are really difficult and painful for me to read - and I feel borderline violated when I do. I know I could simply choose not to look at these posts, but it's kind of like that car accident or vomit thing...so bad you can't look away. An attack on one feminist is an attack on all of us, on everything we're fighting for, on our friends and family, and I take it quite personally (ugh, I know, I know, that's their goal).
Do any other readers have the same reaction? I question if it's necessary or productive to put this knuckle-dragging negative bullshit in the community, although if it helps you vent and feel empowered to do so (rather than just staying silent), I'm totally willing to sacrifice my comfort. After all, it's not my inbox, so who am I to talk?
And not that it matters, but you are fucking beautiful.
They ARE difficult to read, but at the same time, completely fascinating because they all seem to share so many characteristics.
Not one of them made me think, "Well, that was hurtful, but clever." When you resort to "You're stupid!" "You're ugly!" "Insert my full vocab of cuss words here!" you're admitting that you don't really have much to back it up with.
I mean, if the truth is coming out of an ugly person's mouth, how does that make it any less true? (You're not ugly, Courtney, and I hesitate at asking that rhetorical question at ALL, but wanted to point out that the logic is just not there).
I think it was Harlan Ellison who said, "Don't you love it when somebody finally works up the courage to make an anonymous phone call, and the best they can manage is fuck you?"
Ah, well, appearance matters to a certain kind of person when the speaker is a woman. After all, "ugly," "slut," or "dyke" are the three slurs (roughly speaking) used to automatically discredit any woman who steps out of line.
One of my favorite "WTF" memories is from high school, where I was harassed on an ongoing basis for (supposedly) being gay; the real issue, of course, was that I was liberal and feminist in a town where nice girls kept their mouths shut and liked it. Once I started dating a young man, the slurs I received on a daily basis continued--they just switched from "dyke" to "slut." "Ugly," of course, I had received from day one and continued to hear.
Ain't patriarchy grand?
I think a trigger warning may have been in order, but otherwise, this didn't really rattle me too much. It does, however, suck.
Now, that is NOT because you're too sensitive or anything. You are totally right to respond that way. I read a lot of random stuff on the web NOT related to feminism and politics and I see how a lot of topics break down to this kind of abuse.
It breaks my heart a little every day, but I think it is also really important that we stay aware of this stuff and be prepared for what kind of responses we can expect in our lives if we dare to speak up outside the friendly confines.
And to keep an eye out for it. I find myself more aware that these attitudes persist even amongst people and areas to which I am exposed. As much as I would like to think that in my little bubble of only having ever lived in NYC and LA that this isn't nearby, but things like this remind me they are. And while it makes me sad, I consider it a good thing because it reminds me how important it is.
The ladies here put themselves on the line for us (all of us) a lot and we should commiserate with them just as much as we celebrate with them.
I see the merits in posting comments like these, but to me, being reminded that these attitudes exist really isn't one of them. I know people think like this, I know people talk like this, and I know people treat women like this. We all know, because we've all experienced it too (albeit on different levels). Everybody here knows what misogyny feels like, and I don't think we're in danger of forgetting about it anytime soon without reading vicious, baseless, violent swill.
You don't necessarily have to be exposed to abuse to know it exists.
Again, it's ultimately the editors' right to post these mailbags, and I respect their decision to do so or not. I was just throwing the idea out there that it might not be constructive or that it may do more harm than good. I mean, those assholes now have undeniable proof that not only did their hateful comments actually reach Courtney, but that she read them, and now that they’ve been posted on a widely-read blog, thousands of other like-minded people involved in the same struggle have as well. I can't imagine what could be more satisfying to them than that.
On the other hand, I’m not a big fan of the “ignore the bullies and they’ll go away” approach – when fucked up shit happens, it should be called out. I’m wondering if there isn’t some kind of middle ground between pretending this stuff doesn’t happen and somewhat legitimizing it by giving it an even bigger platform from which to speak (in this case, a blog post). I don’t have an answer.
This, however:
Also, I WANT people to know that this is the kind of horribleness that feminists get, that the whole sexism-doesn't-exist excuse is bullshit and that being out as a feminist (whether on TV, in school, in your family, etc) comes with consequences.
makes complete sense, and I definitely agree with it. This is a good reason why I wouldn’t mind tolerating the discomfort these posts make me feel for the sake of proving a larger, more important point.
And I too want to throw in my big thank you to the women (and commenters) on Feministing – and really anybody who openly identifies as a feminist and actively fights misogyny. It’s just not easy, and you’re all incredibly strong.
I dunno, I think there are merits in simply reminding us of this. Sure, everyone knows these attitude exist, but when you get these attacks personally it's hard not to take them to heart.
Knowing that someone as attractive and thin as courtney still gets these horrendous attacks on her appearance serves as a good reminder the attacks really, truly, actually have nothing to do with your appearance.
Sorry Daisy - that comment was supposed to appear at the bottom of this thread, not as a reply to you. :)
Courtney, I'm really glad you posted these. Yeah, it sucks to see the vitriol, but it also reminds us how much work we have left to do. It also makes me really fucking glad I'm surrounded by women AND men who would never, EVER say things like this. So keep fighting the good fight, gals! We can't let the assholes win!
I do feel ill when I read these things. Like the others, I understand the need to be reminded that people still hold these values. But it is also hard to know that there are some people who, when you walk down the street, are looking at you as either a cunt with legs or a child to be protected.
No matter how many times you tell yourself people like this don't control you, and they don't, the idea that they exist and the implications of that fact is sometimes spiritually exhausting.
I would like to point out that the people sending these letters are pretending to be "borderline violated" by opinions and viewpoints. When you jump on the bandwagon by likening reading words on the internet to violation, you condone the reduction of the dialog to sub-intellectual grunts and pelvic thrusts.
Not that grunts and pelvic thrusts are all bad.
Anyway, on the witches thing, Cher, Sarandon and Pfeiffer were in Witches of Eastwick. A very tenuous social reference to use to invalidate someone's position.
Wow. Courtney, you are a brave soul...and not for appearing on Billo, but for fearlessly reading through those emails, knowing all the while that your head may literally explode. Thanks for taking one for the team! I hope you realize what great work you're doing. Keep on rockin'.
You are exactly the kind of "loudmouthed bitches and lesbians " I want to be around.
... and if my daughter turns out like you, i'm gonna be very proud.
Can we get a trigger warning on this?
I was expecting the sexist masses to say stuff like this but it still hits me in my gut in the worst way. Keep up the good work Courtney and know we're behind you for putting yourself out there.
The hate-filled stupidity hurts my brain. Criticizing a woman's appearance for defending a woman criticized for her appearance. Smart.
I thought you were terrific on the clip in the post below. You kept your cool and called him out.
Anyway, I can be mean too. See if any of these wankers were stupid enough to use a work email address and let their bosses know what they're up to on the clock.
I am shocked and appalled! One would think that the legion of brave autodidacts, self-educated by non-disingenuous non-demagogues like Rush and O'Reilly, would have brought their more cogent, reasoned arguments to the table.
P.S. Italics have infected the site.
Were there any positive letters from people watching the show (as opposed to bloggers who watched it afterwards)? I'd be much more interested to see if you got through to any of his audience.
Those replies make my stomach turn, but it'd be unfair to judge all Fox News viewers by the extreme.
Yeah, I sorta second the Trigger Warning. Its really difficult to read some of this stuff. Its insanely misogynistic & violent & shaming. It sends shivers up my spine.
You're incredibly brave. Llke, fo' realz. I find it really difficult reading this stuff, and its not even about me.
Its incredibly silencing and even though I expected stupidity from these comments, I don't think I expected this level of hate and intensity. Thanks for sharing, though, since its perfect proof for your point.
(I dont want to legitimize their comments by countering it, but you looked REALLY pretty)
Will there ever be a day when "feminists are ugly" ceases to be a legitimate argument?
The comment about Cher, Susan Sarandon, and Michelle Pfeiffer is an allusion to The Witches of Eastwick, where they played a coven and harem of attractive, single, outcast women to Jack Nicholson's devil.
That's what I thought, too.
Of course, I started watching that movie one time because I thought it would be something like Practical Magic (which is corny, but much less... ugh). No such luck.
I'm also curious-- did you get any decently well-reasoned, calm, nonhateful criticism? I mean, even one? That was polite and addressed the issues and not your face?
that was hard to read... it's disgusting and abhorrent. i don't even know what to say.
besides tearing down your looks (which btw not that it's relevant but i think you're beautiful) but why don't (according to these idiots) ugly women have the right to have an opinion and speak out? ugly men are able to speak out about their opinions without scrutiny for their appearance most of the time... why can't women have the same privilege?
it all just baffles me... i just don't understand it....
What an absolute cesspool of stupid.
I'm disgusted by the fact that they assume that because you have a vagina, you're ultimate goal in life is to find a husband.
It's sort of refreshing that they just come out and say they don't think "ugly" women or lesbians deserve to be treated like people, or even to exist. I mean, aren't they making our argument for us, which is that sexism still exists and hurts women?
I kind of see your point on this. People who are not as openly vicious as these folks tend to be baffled by my insistence that feminism is, purely and simply, the assertion that women are actual-factual human beings. These mild-mannered sexists try to insist that they do think women are people! They really do! Just, like, people with fewer rights and stuff. Well, when anonymity allows these sexists to really say what they're thinking without fear of repercussion, the truth comes out: they really don't think women are people. They really don't think women have any value other than as wombs, slaves, or sexbots. It's really handy that they should do our work for us by being so blunt, because now I don't have to sit there and explain all the subtly hateful bullshit I witness every day--I can just point skeptics to the kind of vitriol Courtney received, because it proves my assertion so admirably.
That was hard to read, but of course it only proves the points you made so eloquently on O'Reilly.
I know you want to be taken seriously for your WORK, not your appearance, but when I watched the clip my first thought (before you said anything) was "Wow, she is really gorgeous" -- which strengthens the position that the comments against Helen Thomas were misogynistic in nature and not just digging at her voice or appearance in some gender-neutral way.
Of course it is gross and hypocritical for ugly old Billo to comment on anybody's appearance. But since he is a MAN, he can be judged on accomplishments rather than double chins or thinning hair, right?
I think it's funny that one person said you had a Jay Leno chin and another said you had an underbite! Does not compute.
The guy who says it's his job to protect deserving women and he would throw you to the predators -- Who does he think the predators are? There are no lions, tigers and bears in these parts. The predators are jerks like him who believe their penis gives them some privileged status to select who is and is not "worthy" based on appearance and comforming to the patriarchy.
Best regards to you too, fuckface.
I LOVE "fuckface." I use it all the time.
Wow. I could hardly breathe by the end of those. Even if they're morons, reading that kind of hate-diarrhea is gut-wrenching.
Courtney - I very much hope you can do something nice slash fun for yourself today! You SERIOUSLY deserve it after displaying so much awesomeness on the show and enduring such negative email energy.
I shed a tear maybe three, four times a year. This made me cry.
Exactly. I didn't cry, but that's only because I had to make a REALLY concerted effort not to. My throat was tight the whole time, and I couldn't even stand to read all of it - I just skimmed. Totally brutal.
Wow, these are some epistolary gems. My reactions are (in this order):
1.disbelief that anyone could be so hopelessly idiotic.
2.morbid curiosity about what the hell goes on in those people's heads.
3.boredom, because their idiocy consists of completely predictable cliches.
4.frustration with idiots for not being more entertaining. They should mix it up a little every once in a while. Like, I dunno, suggest that feminists are alien infiltrators whose mission is to bring about the end of humanity because our society will collapse without patriarchy to hold it together.
Hahaha! Not exactly articulate, are they?
It's always the same old shit: ur ugly! ur a lesbian! I'll stick my fingers in my ears and LALALALALALALA I can't hear you and that way I don't have to formulate a coherent response!
Argumentum ad hominem. Look it up, you blustery, windbag guys of the hate mails. Not a valid way to argue a point. Gassing on about your irrelevant opinion of someone's appearance has no bearing on the validity of their arguments. And if we are to speak of appearance, you dudes are ALL fashion models yourselves, yes? ...no.
I rest my case.
I think it is dangerous to write all the people off as "idiots" or "morons". While they are clearly uneducated and scared by the challenge to the patriarchal paradigm, they are sentient beings who had the choice to write these comments.
That being said: Courtney, you were smart and quick witted on the show. You stuck to your main points and didn't fall into the defensive position that misogynist, self-important, windbag was trying to push you into. I'd say it was as successful as a feminist could hope for on that show.
As someone who is far too introverted to do what you do... I am a lesbian and a feminist who thanks you and everyone else at Feministing from the bottom of my heart for putting yourselves out there every day and fighting for us all.
I don't know how you put up with it. Don't let their hatred get to you.
Keep up the good work, it is badly needed.
"One of my jobs as a man is to protect (deserving) women. I would NOT protect you. In fact, I would toss you to the predators. I would trade you to the predators. I would betray you to the predators. I would NOT want you to pass on your weak genetics."
I hadn't realized Dwight Schrute was an O'Reilly Fan.
hhahahahahahaha endless LOLz.
lol forever, that absolutely cracked my shit up, which I desperately needed after reading that. HA. Now I can go back and reread them all with Dwight narrating...
Oh my, I can't even BREATHE now. And I was just saying to a friend a few hours ago that I didn't think anyone in real life was actually like Dwight. I stand corrected!
I agree with most of the posters, these kinds of letters are hard to read, it does make one despair for the state of the society. That there are these people out there, that they sit down and write these disgusting letters to you. It's enough to make one nauseous.
But then I come here, and read these wonderful comments by feministing readers. Every single one of them, supportive, caring and kind. With these hateful letters, it's sometimes easy to forget how many good people there are out there, wonderful people who are committed to honesty to the fight for what's good.
As long as I can read all you commenters messages, I have hope for the world. I firmly believe that there's always going to be more good people out there than bad. It's just that the bad people sometimes scream louder.
I think one of the greatest things Stephen Colbert has done on his show involved the above quote from Rush. I paraphrase ...
"'Feminism was established in order to allow unattractive women equal access to the mainstream' -- which is exactly what Talk Radio did for unattractive men!"
I thought of exactly the same thing when I saw these ignorant apes regurgitate Rush Limbaugh's soundbites, without even a shread of irony.
A few weeks ago, there was actually a thread in the Community forums linking to the actual Colbert Report-clip.
Here: http://community.feministing.com/2009/02/feb-3-colbert-report.html
(Meant "shred" of course).
Yet another double standard. If a woman doesn't look like a supermodel, her opinions don't matter. But then again attractive women's opinions don't matter because you can't be beautiful and smart. If you're a man, your appearence is never mentioned when talking about your opinions.
This makes me want to vomit/cry/throw things. I was just thinking though... tomorrow is Friday. Do I feel a Friday Feminist Fuck You coming on? Please? It's more than deserved.
Oh, and ps, speaking of Feministing regular features.. today is Thursday. So thank you, Courtney, thank you so much for all you do.
Courtney, just wanted to pass on my love and support for the things you do. You make me a stronger feminist!
That was a positively brutal read and I can only imagine how much more hurtful this would have been for you. Thanks for staying tough. Everyone of those hateful comments only served to prove how right on you are.
Wow...after reading such clever material (*sarcasm*), my two reactions are: One,you think these ignorami would come up with more original insults than "You're a lesbian/dyke" or "You fucking cunt", but no. And two, I just laughed. In situations like this, laughing at it works just fine.
If anything, this gives us more incentive/motivation to right the wrongs in women's rights and issues on so many levels.
That was physically painful to read. But thank you Courtney, and bless you for all you do.
Thanks Courtney for fighting the good fight. :)
Gee I wonder how O'Reilly feels about what his viewers are saying to you since he seems to think all the meanies are on the left. I saw the last part of your segment and I thought you were awesome. You didn't back down for a second!
O'Reilly is a liar of the highest order. He will never admit to anything ever.
These insults are pathetic. I'm sure those losers are wanking off imagining that their oh-so-clever remarks are making Courtney cry.
I think forwarding all those letters to O'Reilly would prove the point you made last night, plus it'll make him realize that his audience comprises of knuckle-dragging asshats
Courtney I'm so sorry I just couldn't watch the whole thing. I bravely soldiered on through the opening guff but once O'Reilly started arguing I just had to turn it off. His proclivity to take an argument in a direction it was never headed, and shriek pointlessly about unrelated topics so his guests look bad is so mind-bendingly frustrating for me. Thanks for stepping up and dealing with the lunacy head-on.
To add to the enormous amount of comments, that say largely the same thing: thank you for doing what you do. It is sometimes easy to forget/ignore that there is such a degree of hatred toward so many people, especially when you live somewhere very liberal and relatively safe.
I hesitated to add to the already long list, with the logic that it might get tedious to read, and then I remembered the horrible things you are getting in your inbox. In the same boat, I would want love mail to equal the hate mail.
So again, thank you. My humor-less dykey self is dreadfully grateful, lol.
a) You are well-informed and better composed than me...
b) You chin, like the rest of you, mind down to soul, is terribly beautiful
c) You are living proof that sharp analysis, strong dedication, solid education, unfailing commitment, a pinch of privilege and smattering of luck can allow good people access to the mainstream
d) You brilliant, wonderful woman... you're everything a compassionate and strong human being should be... one of my jobs as a fellow human being is to help build a brighter future and i look forward to following your example
e) Were you born that smart or did you study really hard?
f) All you trailblazing feminists are so different and it's really enriching to grow from the critical space that bridges all that diversity
g) Keep holding your head up high and ignore all the letters from folks with IQs under 9... Stick around... Please!
h) Let me be the umpteen millionth today to compliment you on your brilliance, both inside and out
i) Umm... not sure how to respond to the Cher comment, but i really like Jack's impersonation from Will & Grace
j) Are you and Nikolai planning on getting married? He is pretty cute...
k) Hmnnnn... did you go to public school, like me? Do you listen to NPR? I know I do... pretty Great, huh?
l) You hear that? You're young... I hope that's contagious... I could do with a little more youth
m) I wonder how many of O'Reilly's viewers fantasize about being spanked by the lech
n) You wonderful person
o) It's incredible how measured you kept your voice even as O'Reilly was screeching and yelping a big load of crap
p) You go... yeah, you go, Courtney!
q) I'll let discretion be the better part of keeping my friends humble rather than comment on what a great job you did
r) Hey, smartie pants, you're such an atypical go-getter... how do you do it? There's got to be a point where you run out of great ideas and stop getting published - I mean, it's just not fair to us ordinary people
s) I don't have any kids (yet), but if I ever do, I hope each and every one turns out to be as much of a firebrand as you are... big thanks to the 'rents
This was incredibly difficult to read, but I think it's something that needs to be shared. It's important to remember that there are many actual people out there who still don't consider women to be human and deserving of the same treatment as men.
I think you did a wonderful job on Billo's show by the way.
Charming. Could I get some email addresses for these people? Because I think I just found my future husband...
Seriously, though, I'm disgusted, but I guess I'm not surprised. It's just another great example of why feminism is still (and probably always will be) necessary.
It's funny that people are criticizing Courtney's looks when (IMHO) they would have done so regardless of how she presented herself. I think she looked just the way a professional should have presented herself in a public interview--freaking professional. The fact that they are calling Courtney a "lesbian" (is that supposed to be insulting?) really makes my blood boil. If Courtney was a Carmen Electra lookalike (which I guess is the mainstream version of attractiveness) then these asshats would still have criticized her looks, probably by calling her a "slut" or something.
Just goes to show that, in any case, sexist idiots think they can knock you down by making rude comments about your appearance. I dealt with something similar while blogging for my local paper and yeah... Props to Courtney and everybody else who has to deal with this bullshit. Reading this crap makes me proud to be a feminist.
Well as mentioned above you're quite brave for opening the e-mails. I can however not take this in any other way than with a lot of humor. I laughed out loud a couple of times, some of them are just too funny. I can't people would waste their time on this, I guess trying to uphold something which was hurt just by watching TV.
Have never understood why it should be a goal only to keep "beautiful" people in the mainstream. Neither am I completely on the clear with what that mainstream would be.
Kudos on a great appearance on the factor!
We can make light all we want, but maybe some of these letter-writers know something we don't know.
For one thing, I didn't know we had predators. The top of the food chain a tough place to be, and in this predator-eat-feminist world you can never be too comfortable.
Who are these predators? What do they want to do with us? What would the letter writer get in return for trading a feminist to a predator? Which of us dyke-lesbo-feminazis has a man around to help us pass on our genetics anyway (much less protect us from these predators)??
-concerned feminist
You know very well that us men keep you safe from t-rexes on the daily. Don't forget it for one minute! As for what the carnivorous dinosaurs want, we can only guess... I think they're building castles out of teeth in order to capture tooth fairies so they can harvest their tooth-honey. It's very complicated, so I understand if your tiny female brain doesn't understand (or was it the dinosaurs who had the tiny brains?)
Who does that third guy think he is? Like there's just a wild pack of jaguars waiting that he can throw whatever women he chooses at? My god what will we do without the protection of this one asshole!
Not just a wild pack of jaguars...a wild pack of jaguars that know how to trade for food!
As a man, these make me want to bang my head against a wall. I mean, these are the guys out there presenting themselves as the pinnacle of studliness? Good lord.
The O'Reilly Factor was established to grant unattractive men access to the mainstream. Oh, and falafels.
*Trigger*
Also, um, how are you possibly ugly? Clearly these people have never left their houses and have no idea what humans are supposed to look like.
Come on guys. Clearly these people are onto something. The site obviously needs to be shut down.
Courtney - Kudos to you again for your presence last night. Not that it will make you feel any better, but as a result of a few people I know linking to my post about the whole incident (starting on Monday), at least one site and mine have been getting a constant stream of similar vitriol. Talk about our DNA being 99% alike.
Obviously you did great. I can't imagine what they'd have to say if you hadn't done so well (and I'm not really sure what they were expecting - just think about that!).
Thanks for speaking up.
Thanks for the support everyone. I wanted to clarify that I've gotten a lot of amazing emails as well...not so much from strangers (although there were a few of those), but from my community of friends, feminists, family, readers, writers etc. It's amazing to feel that kind of backing and I'm frankly unphased by all this nasty bashing from the other folks. I just thinks it's important to share b/c O'Reilly and others act like it's all a big game, but there are real consequences for the way his following speaks to women and treat other human beings generally.
Thank you for being such a strong role model for people like me :)
"Feminism was established in order to allow unattractive women equal access to the mainstream.... Feminism as practiced by the likes of you is nothing more than a means to gain access to the mainstream of society "
Oh my! That women would have the unmitigated gall to live for anything else but to be attractive for such a prince. What was I thinking.
lol on this: "I am flabergasted [sic]. Were you born that retarded."
There's really no point in trying to educate these people, is there? I suppose we have to let them roam about outside, but it's quite regrettable.
Putting a trigger warning on now. And I hear what you're saying about posting these - it's something we've talked about as a group before.
My feeling is that it's important to post these because it takes some of their power away; if we're able to post them and make fun of them. Also, I WANT people to know that this is the kind of horribleness that feminists get, that the whole sexism-doesn't-exist excuse is bullshit and that being out as a feminist (whether on TV, in school, in your family, etc) comes with consequences. But those are just my thoughts on it.
I wonder if there's a way to strike a happy medium - to continue to post these but maybe do something after the jump so folks who are (rightly) disturbed by the emails and don't want to read them don't have to...other ideas?
As a blogger who is constantly challenged about how there's no sexism or how much better it is now, or how rare it is, I do appreciate you posting an entry like this. I'm not sure what the best way is to protect those for whom this is traumatic to read, but as documentation to what gets lobbed at us, it is really important. Thanks.
I agree with you on this - so often, my closest girlfriends and even my mother ask me what it is I get so "strident" about; and isn't sexism over?
...nope. That said, this truth isn't an easy one to accept. I guess I'll just have to keep being strident about how wrong it is. I'm so glad I have this great community to turn to!
Oh, I totally support you guys posting these. I agree with your take on it. Its just sort of, this level of verbal abuse seems like it should require a little forewarning.
I think a trigger warning before the jump would suffice.
"Feminism as practiced by the likes of you is nothing more than a means to gain access to the mainstream of society."
I don't even understand what this means! "Access to the mainstream?" What does that mean?
"Feminism as practiced by the likes of you is nothing more than a means to gain access to the mainstream of society."
I don't even understand what this means! "Access to the mainstream?" What does that mean?
Reading this makes me angry; why do members of society think that it's ok to spread hate like this? It also makes me sad that the people who sent you all those cruel comments are parents spreading this hate onto their offspring. Enough is enough, when is it going to change?
Thank you.
One of the most unfortunate things about the internet is that it gives people like that the opportunity to spew s*** while hiding behind their laptops. Do you think every one of them would have the guts to even tell you half this stuff to your face? I highly doubt it.
I also wanted to add, in response to Billo's taunting you about Sarah Palin on SNL; Sarah Palin responded that she HAD seen the parody and liked it (even though she listened to it without the sound on, allegedly) Plus, she went on the show. Maybe if Bill invited Helen on the show to let her have HER say...and Helen got up and pulled a Jerry Springer on him...well, I can dream, can't I?
Regarding SNL, from what I saw of it (I admit I didn't watch all of it), it didn't seem like they were being sexist towards her; they were just making fun of things she actually said and did, much the same as they would for any politician. So either I missed something, or O'Rielly is redefining sexism as "making fun of women I agree with". But I guess we already knew that he's a raving hypocrite, so I'm not sure what my point is.
Also, Courtney is awesome. Yay, Courtney! Way to stand up to that bully!
And don't forge the ragingly sexist characterization of Bush the 1st by Dana Carvey, who made fun of his voice and diction as well, seeing as impressions are always inherently sexist. Obviously impressions and satire can logically be held up as evidence of hypocrisy in the face of a man putting on a high falsetto to mock a woman's voice. Or a woman doing an extremely low "me-cave-man, me-need-food" rumble to mock a man's, for that matter.
[/snark]
Courtney, thank you so much for taking on Bill O'Reilly. Someone needed to.
AND I have to admit, I was thrilled when he said he'd apologise if you could prove you'd defended Sarah Palin as well, because I remember that post (quoted it in a paper!). I hope he does.
I really can't express how much I respect and admire what you did. I'm not sure I could do the same in so composed and elegant a manner. Way to go!!
Hey, Courtney, you should have released the names/handles of these assholes and publicly shame them for their misogyny.
I find the hate mail kind of motivating. Can't say why. Maybe 'cause it's kind of fun to debunk bullshit.
And I love the message from the father with four "professional" daughters. That's just ... sick. Isn't it great to know how easy it is for conservative wingnuts in this country to disown their own children? But, after knowing how often this happens to LGBT folk, I'm totally unsurprised. I just talked to a self-proclaimed conservative woman today who actually threatened to not allow her two college-student daughters - probably very nice, smart, wonderful girls - to live at home during the summer for getting tiny nose piercings. I'm like ... are you people human? You won't let your daughters live in the house because of their jewelry? I know parents have rules about their houses and what-not, but I'm sorry. That's just fucked.
Men can't stand the idea that we are strong and smart without them.
Ignorant pigs.
I always laugh my ass off when these boneheads talk about how a feminist will never "land" a man or "find" a man. So, I guess if 1., you want to date, 2., want to date a man, 3., want to be monogomous with a man, 4., want to spend the buttload of money it takes to marry him, then take your God-fearin' fishing pole down to Man Lake, get in your American Flag boat, bait your hook with compliments about big muscles, and throw that line in! Wait for the menz to bite!
Props to you, Courtney, going on his show and giving him a piece of your mind. You really stayed focused on the issue at hand and didn't fall for any of his petty distractions.
Also, was it just me or was he really comparing his "serious" news show to SNL? Isn't that counter-intuitive on his part?
This level of ignorance makes me sad. People like those hateful commenters illustrate how important it is for our society to improve its educational system. It was proven many years ago that women are people, but the word doesn't seem to have gotten around yet. Also, their vocabularies are small and their grammatical skills regrettable at best. Maybe it's not our girl-parts that scare them so much as our brains. :)
(Braaaaiins... [/zombie] Ahem. Sorry. Listened to a little to much Jonathan Coulton this week.)
Since these guys are all working so hard on the "feminists are ugly" angle, I assume they included photos of their own shining visages, which no doubt put the likes of Brad Pitt and Rob Pattinson to shame? Uh-oh, looks like they forgot to wipe the Dorito crumbs from their whiskers before they took the pic. Darn.
first of all let me say i am a republican but please do not hold this against me my fiance on the other hand is a frequenter and supporter of your site and causes so i have heard a fair deal of the bad responses you receive. and even though i dont always agree with what you have to say i support fully your right to say it with out having to deal with the ignorance of the more idiotic people out there. one day the world will be a better place when fourms like yours are no longer necessary when the world takes women, men, color or creed for what they truly are, equals
-josh dain
I don't really think anyone will hold you being a Republican against you, Josh. All most of us want is equality and for women of any background to be able to express their opinions, just as men do. I have a few conservative beliefs myself, but I adore this site and love how outspoken the women are on it. Though there are disagreements here and there, in the end most people are so respectful to each other and I really like that.
Unfortunately, not a lot of people think like you. Or at least, not enough. It's really hard to try to express and opinion when you know you're one wrong step away from being a 'dumb bitch' in someone's eyes.
This shit hurts. But I really enjoy reading it here, because it's followed by 100 comments by smarter, more thoughtful people. That support cushion we ladies have is real nice. And yeah, if my kids grow up to be anything like you Courtney, it'll be a victory.
"""I have four daughters about your age and they are all professionals. I would be devastated if any one of them turned out to be like you. You parents must be ashamed to admit to your apparent idiosyncrasies with their friends, relatives and neighbors. If you were my daughter, you'd be out of the will in a flash."""
Wow. What a great parent, that they'd disown their child for having thoughts that differ from their own. Of all the comments, I think this one is the cruelest.
You're a wonderful person, and I am glad you aren't letting these ignorant comments get to you. You have our support.
I'm actually surprised that so many people watch the O'Reilly Factor!
Disturbing!
When I was researching for a powerpoint on feminism(s), I made the mistake of typing the word "feminism" into google images. The sheer volume of anti-feminist sites was jarring!
Maybe it was a bit naive of me (okay, a lot naive of me), but I really didn't realise how much of it was out there.
I found one image of a swastika comprised entirely of Fs. Because, apparently, fascism and feminism are inextricably linked.