I'm sorry, I know I've already posted about the wacko responses to my book (excuse me, my book cover), but I just came across this and I just couldn't help myself.
Ericka Andersen at LadyBlog has written a post that has brought intellectual dishonesty to a new low. She even starts off lying:
For some thought-provoking reading, check out Jessica Valenti's "The Purity Myth: How America's Obsession with Virginity is Hurting Young Women." Cassy Fiano's post on the book today lead me to check it out for myself.
Thought-provoking reading...really? You checked it out for yourself, did you? May I ask how? Because the book isn't going to be released for another five months. So, Ms. Andersen, if you've somehow stealthily broken into my apartment or hacked into my computer, I'd really like to know.
I grew up in a Christian environment where sex before marriage was frowned upon but never was the act of sex condemned. I was never told women don't like sex as much as men or that we were supposed to use it to get husbands. I doubt Jessica has really been in the midst of this environment but as someone who has, I can tell you women and men were both encouraged to be disciplined in their sexual urges. And...I've never once heard a church leader say you were a slut or a whore if you did choose to have sex. This is an assumption Jessica makes. (Emphasis mine)
Right, I make a whole book full of assumptions. Women are never ever told they're sluts or sullied or or less than or diseased if they have sex. I must be making stuff up!
But here's the part that had me screaming to my poor boyfriend about what fucking liars people are.
The real purity myth is what Jessica is telling women: that sexual consequences be damned as long as you feel good. God forbid you have guilt. Girls Gone Wild is better for young women that purity rings, she claims, but I doubt many people would sign up for that argument.
Sexual consequences be damned? I've spent my entire writing and feminist career advocating for young women to have medically accurate and unbiased information about sex so they can make the decisions that are best for them. I have never, never, said that Girls Gone Wild is anything but a fucked up organization run by a rapist. For people like Fiano and Andersen to warp - and just lie! - about this work that I do, it's just beyond disgusting. I understand that they have no actual argument to make (being that, you know, they haven't read the book), but simply making stuff up to suit their theories is not only dishonest, it's stupid. Because I'm not going to sit quietly and let people lie about me, about feminism, about this blog, or about The Purity Myth. Every time someone publishes some bullshit like this, I'm going to call it out. Welcome to my new post series, Pure Lies.
So bring it, assholes.
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LadyBlog, really? You always know when someone starts calling women "ladies" they're about to unload some serious sexist BS on you.
Please do keep posting about the lying "christians' already worked up about your book.
And though I know it makes you mad, you have to realize, if your book is already getting this much attention, it will be YOU that benefits in the end. No such thing as bad publicity, etc. etc. I used to work in a bookstore...people came in all the time, see a book they remembered hearing about, and picked it up. They don't remember WHAT they heard, just that they heard the title before. And then, at least some of the time, you get a sale. It's awesome.
Yeah, you're right emjaybee, totally. It's just so incredibly infuriating. But def true about the publicity. I'll keep that in mind the next time I'm ready to pull my hair out. ;)
Jessica, just thought you would want to know that there are 4 comments on LadyBlog and they are all in support of you!
alicialynn, I just saw that! Feministing commenters rawk.
We've got your back, jessica!
We've got your back, jessica!
Anderson should be grateful that, largely due to feminism, it is much less acceptable for pastors or anyone else to publicly slut-shame women who dare to have pre-paper contract sex.
By the way, purity rings are creepy. And I'm willing to bet condoms are more effective at preventing STDs and unwanted pregnancies. Just sayin'.
Oh yeah, and I suppose that my decision to stay a virgin was made COMPLETELY IN SPITE of the comprehensive sex-ed and feminist education I am fortunate to have had.
Clearly, they are disappointed that they could never achieve the transplendent feminist womanosity that is you. Well, maybe after the mother of all paradigm shifts. Here's hoping they all read your book and get there.
This veers slightly off-topic, but I don't get this about a lot of Christian churches (the purity ring thing). I went to a Presbyterian church during high school, and we had church-sponsored sex ed classes that were really good and educational. Learning about the consequences from a honest and factual viewpoint is probably what was in the back of my mind as a stayed a virgin until I was 21. SO THERE. :P
You kick ass, Jessica.
Slut? Never heard of it.
In all seriousness, Doesn't she feel GUILTY about lying like that? GOD FORBID YOU HAVE GUILT.
Slut? Never heard of it.
In all seriousness, Doesn't she feel GUILTY about lying like that? GOD FORBID YOU HAVE GUILT.
Jessica, you are a role model. If you check back, there are even more comments to that terrible blog in your support! Give 'em hell!
Jess, you and the classy laydeez at Feministing are my fucking heroes.
Another thing: Miss Ladyblog may have never heard a church leader say that a woman is a slut if she chooses to have sex (I kind of doubt that) -- but I have, and I didn't even grow up in a religious or conservative house. I heard it from pastors at friends' churches, I heard it from other kids at school, I heard it from a few teachers (one of them a biology teacher who willingly taught creationism, might I add). I even heard it from a boy I was dating. I saw it every time I watched a horror film in which the "sexy" girl got knifed while the "innocent" girl went free. I saw it newspapers, in TV shows, in music videos. Unless she lived with blinders on, Miss Ladyblog is either lying or in deep and terrifying denial.
In any case, really, Jessica, you rock.
*Breathe*
It is fear of the truth. The people against you are afraid that somehow you might be right, especially when all they can do is look at the facts of how their movement is failed.
I grew up in the purity movement and at the age of 13 had the common sense to know that I did not have enough information to make a rational decision about staying a virgin before marriage. I did eventually succumb to the pressure, but eventually snapped out of it and I suppose I'm probably a slut in the eyes of the "right".
Never mind, rock on Jessica, I'm happy you have written the book. Another good read for all of you is Dagmar Herzog's "Sex in Crisis". I've worked for two of the women she cites, and I can tell you that she is accurate in her conclusions, just as I expect Jessica's to be.
Onward to Amazon.com to pre-order!!!!
secretinsidegirl, we already know she is willing to lie so why would she stop at lying about reading the book when she could lie about everything in her argument? :)
Jessica, I read Full Frontal Feminism and LOVED it. I am looking forward to this new book (in five months :) time). With any luck, all this stupidity will actually end you up on the Daily Show or Rachel Maddow. Now, wouldn't that be cool!
Love.
"Ericka,
We realize who cuts your checks, and empathize with the idea that you have to regurgitate what you’re being fed. But, if your hackery weren’t so transparent, it’d make it far easier for all to swallow.
You’re reviewing a book to which you can’t possibly have legal access.
From your previous writings it’s obvious that you’ve got a grayed relationship with the concept of “objective fact.” For example, inferring Planned Parenthood is racist — ignoring the possibility that they might be helping those communities who need their services the most.
I agree, it’s much easier to write this fluff when no one capable of critical thought will read it. Why invite anyone to critique your work, when you’ve got an army of like minded people begging for the red meat you’re happy to dish out.
And, perhaps you’re in fact prophetic… With the sweeping Democratic victories in November, there will be a lot of demand for mindless conservative angst.
Finally, while I understand Human Events would like to bolster your obviously thin resume, you might want to remove your MSNBC appearance from your miniature biography.
For those who might not have caught it, when it was originally broadcast, feel free to enjoy Ericka getting her argument inverted and stuffed back at her by Jon Soltz. By the by, you really should have just walked straight off the cliff and suggested that not only is it possible that Osama Bin Laden is in Iraq — but, the America hating Democrats know he’s in Iraq and want to bring our troops home so he’ll never be caught.
http://www.truveo.com/Veterans-launch-ad-opposing-McCain/id/80849603
Cheers,
SPiHC"
even better, you can support your local feminist bookstore, if you are lucky enough to have one, or order from the many that have online services, like www.womenandchildrenfirst.com.
Those comments made me smile. Every one of them is on your side Jessica aside from one who was calling us all a bunch of whiners (coincidence it's the same person who emailed you that really sexist email a few weeks back and is mad because you posted it on here for us to laugh at). I especially enjoyed the comment someone made about how Anderson kills homeless people. Very humorous. Anyway, go Jessica! Can't wait for the book!
That's how conservatives are. They can't win on the truth because they're wrong, so they have to lie. It's sad, really. You'd think that being so wrong would inspire them to change their opinions. Instead, they become liars.
Jess - I need you to know that your courage inspires me daily. This site is a lifeline and a source of strength and sanity for me and so many other women coping with life.
I completely empathize with you as you deal with these fucktards on a daily basis. Their lies about your book mean jack shit. The truth that you speak is more powerful and infinitely more captivating. I believe that people will be drawn to your honesty and candor and great writing, and not to the misogyny, hatred and brutal dishonesty of these people.
Thank you for all that you do and all that you are.
I can't wait to read your book, though I might be a little jealous that you wrote it before I could. :)
I feel led to apologize on behalf of Christians (and thanks for your comment, Lelah, which is what I lead at my church, too) - but - at the risk of sounding judgmental (too late!) - there ain't no way that blogger is a Christian. (Not the way I define Christian, anyway.)
Anyway, I don't always agree with everything I read on Feministing, but I lovelovelovelovelovelovelove this site and community and I'm (breathe, Aerin, breathe) sorry you're having to deal with all of this, Jessica. I think that's why God created merlot, but hey, oreos work, too.....
Jessica, I'm so thankful you're out there to point out the utter absurdity of these people. You're so much braver than me because you're out there loud and proud under public scrutiny. Love your work!
After reading this post and the comments, I spotted this "headline" on CNN:
http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/personal/10/09/tf.friends.with.benefits/index.html
"The proper way to be friends with benefits". Hmm. So when will the right-wingers start bombarding CNN with hate? Obviously, Jessica is really the head of the media elite conspiracy group, shaping the MSM to her evil slut-promoting ways. /snark.
We'll be keeping our eyes open. Yeah, an honest review or opinion is one thing, but not even reading it and then just inventing things? Deplorable. I can only imagine your frustration.
PS: I luvs this community. Cyber hugs to all.
Wow, this is hilarious or offensive. I can't quite tell.
Either way, there is definitely going to be a lot of interest drummed up for your book by the time it's released. I can't wait to read it, and it looks like I'm not the only one - the good part is that I'm not writing any reviews just yet. ;)
The only reason everyone on here has your back is because the moderator takes off all the negative comments. Oh... and didn't this sexual revolution happen in the '60's... and isn't it already not a big deal for you to go sit on any cock you like? No one cares anymore. You're stuck in the 50's hun... all of you are. Go find something worth fighting for, because, even though you'll sell some books to a lot of pissed of teens that have intelligent parents that don't want their 14 year old to get pregnant, you're not furthering society in a positive or negative way whatsoever. You're not doing anything but selling some books.
Actually, most feminists DON'T want 14 year olds to get pregnant - which is why we advocate comprehensive, fact-based sex ed and not slut-shaming abstinence-only education.
As for the rest of your post... Not even gonna bother. Bye, troll.
Are you that dense? Did I ever say you, or any, feminist wanted 14 year old girls to get pregnant? Read before you bleed. I said 14 year old girls will buy this drivel. Probably because they haven't been out in the real world long enough to realize that it's not a big deal, which it isn't.
I can't help but giggle at jcwhite's whining. At least he was lucky enough to not send the e-mail from an address revealing his identity a la Alex Kochno. He just has to filter his mail, get a new address, or wait it out. What's the big fucking deal?
Buy what drivel? Have you read the book? Did you read that chapter where Jessica says "hey everyone, have lots and lots of unprotected sex because it's empowering"?
By the way... who advocates this "slut-shaming" that you speak of? I'm pretty damn sure that sex education is standard in an EXTREMELY high percentage of all public schools. And it's NOT a feminist view. It's a view that most people have. I understand that you're an extremist, so you like to fight extremists, but extremists are extreme. Look to the middle. NO ONE CARES. You have your bible-beating "slut-shamers", as you call them, and you have their feminist counterparts... then you have the other 90% of this nation going on about their lives not giving a damn what either of you are babbling about. Water's fine, you should jump in.
Isn't lying about someone in a public space in order to discredit them called libel? I'd like to see some of these LIARS taken to court.
I never said anything about having unprotected sex, either. Respond to what was written, not what you want to argue about just because you're angry. Here, I'll give you something to respond to that'll be more up your alley.
I can't believe us all-powerful and superior men ever even let women learn how to type. This is what we get when a bunch of feminist man-hating unprotected-sex-loving-bisexual-slut-monger-bleeding-axe-wound-having-constantly-on-the-rag-liberals can have their own little blog. It's kinda cute though. I like to see you're trying. Keep trying and maybe one day you'll be a REAL writer! You girls are SOOO CUTE!!
Now, there's a target. Thought I'd make it easier for you.
I never said anything about having unprotected sex, either. Respond to what was written, not what you want to argue about just because you're angry. Here, I'll give you something to respond to that'll be more up your alley.
I can't believe us all-powerful and superior men ever even let women learn how to type. This is what we get when a bunch of feminist man-hating unprotected-sex-loving-bisexual-slut-monger-bleeding-axe-wound-having-constantly-on-the-rag-liberals have their own little blog. It's kinda cute though. I like to see you're trying. Keep trying and maybe one day you'll be a REAL writer! You girls are SOOO CUTE!!
Now, there's a target. Thought I'd make it easier for you.
Can't someone ban this worthless piece of dog sh*t?
Men would confront me... women, well. SO CUTE!!!
Shrug.
I'm not anything you mention, feminismissexism, besides feminist and liberal. A 21-year-old straight virgin is all for Jessica's book. It's really too late for confrontation, anyway. :)
Jessica - You're intelligent and you know that. Your book will be excellent, much like your last one. These people will say what they will, but that doesn't change any of it.
Hope I don't get too cute here for anyone's sore ass, but these morons come here looking for a fight, not information or debate. They have nothing better to do on a Thursday but surf feminist websites and tell us that we're cute. Please, please, please don't pay any attention to these slime balls. Save all that amazing energy you have for your work, not working to defend yourself to empty, vapid arguments. They're like stray dogs, if you stop feeding them they go away.
And then we can all get back to business.
Okay - This irritated the hell out of me enough to come out of lurking. Jessica, I love what you and your badass team are doing for women.
Having all of this preemptive "criticism" is ridiculous and you still have months to go before it goes to press. It is the intellectual equivalent of assuming Catch 22 is about guns. There have been plenty of occasions where my academic work was hijacked in this way and I feel that you are handling it with great finesse and resilience.
Moreover, I would tend to agree with the emjaybee. All of this attention may get more people to read that otherwise would not be compelled. The chatter surrounding your new book speaks volumes about the influence you have as a writer. You have arrived.
We are waiting to see what you come up with next.
/rant
Side note: I wanted to say hello to all the feministing supporters that have made me laugh for months now, thanks!