why isn't there a 'Future Husband' shirt?

What about:

"Future Ex-wife"

or just

"Fish wife". That could do with reclaiming.

I can see that second shirt becoming a big seller to an ironic GLBT crowd. Or both of them, really.

But since it would probably bad to give Heritage the proceeds, I hope someone dupes the designs and donates their revenue to PFLAG or something.

Wait, so after having sex and losing virginity, is all of someone's hotness is gone?

I'm not a virgin anymore, but can I wear this shirt to let other virgins know I'm totally after their hot little virginity?

Once you get married, do you get a shirt that says "current wife"? Maybe, "I kept my virginity for my husband and all I got was this lousy T-shirt"?

bleh. Gee whiz I suddenly feel so....not hot. Quick I need some affirmation!!!!! Help me reclaim my virginity!!!
lol.

I think some of you are missing the point. Those t-shirts are meant for little girls. Can't get them thinking about saving themselves for marriage too soon. BTW-Do they make those in onesies?
(JK)

Why are the little harlots wearing shirts with writing over the breasts anyway? It's SO immodest. Who will want to marry them after they flaunt their disgusting female sexuality like that? They're supposed to be keeping the gates shut, not letting everyone in for a peek!

It must be the fault of those liberal feminists.

"I kept my virginity for my husband and all I got was this lousy T-shirt"?

- Haha, awesome!

How pathetic to aspire to wife-hood just for the sake of being someone's wife.
It's much better to never marry the person you love being with than it is to marry someone who ends up making you miserable.

Because of our cultures pathological fetishizing of female purity, virgins are, in fact, hot... mostly to obnoxious teenage boys because nailing a virgin is some stupid competitive "I GOT HERE FIRST!" badge of honor. And yeah, a lot of young women who are virgins actually capitalize on this: exploiting the "you want what you can't have" mentality can mean lots of dates, lots of boyfriends... it ain't bad. Of course, they're also being trained that their virginity is a one-time-only commodity so they're not learning to actually enjoy their body -- it's more like a mint-on-card action figure that can't be played with or else it will lose all of its value.

And I see these t-shirts as playing into that -- continuing the "tease" of "you want but you can't have neener-neener." The fact that they're for very young girls is what makes it really creepy and fucked-up.

Ponygirl, you took the words right out of my mouth. My only addendum is that it's often middle-aged men who think that virgins are hot, because there's also a despoiling fantasy at work. Think of the Bob Dole/Britney Spears commercials. Or think of the sleazy middle-aged men who used to come onto me when I was a teenager.

EG -- I agree but I'd LIKE to think that even by middle age, most men understand the value of a woman who knows what she's doing over some unspoiled fantasy of the shivering young bride, whereas teenage boys fetishize virgins in part because the virgin isn't going to have any expectations of performance on his part.

Of course, creepy doesn't have an age limit. :)

Yecch. You know, I hope to get married at some point, but somehow I have trouble thinking of myself as a "future wife." Just the phrase reduces whoever identifies with it to nothing more than what it is.

I have to say, though, I looked at the site and I have a hard time objecting to the "refuse to be used" T-shirt. I think that message came out sounding a lot more feminist than they intended it to.

Can someone point me to where it says these shirts are in children's sizes on the site, because i don't see it?

What would these shirts look like if they were for men? I am just curious about this...

ojib: it would have to be something masculine, yet dainty. Like "my cock smells minty fresh" or something.

@ Waterpixi : LOOOOOL. You need to make that shirt. Or at least a comic of it.

I think the next thing we need to do away with -- not with it althogether necessarily but with the perceived necessity of it -- are the man-on-his-knee-with-ring proposals. I think it's this image even more than the wedding that intoxicates young girls. And the whole idea that the culminative moment of THEIR life is something someone ELSE does, CHOOSING them, frames a girl's whole concept of worth in the passive tense.

I don't see why more people can't have mutual, adult discussions about marriage, come to an agreement, and have the creative/surprise/personal element be announcing it to friends & family or something like that. I mean good god most of our country is beyond the bride-price days. It's time for a new tradition!

"Of course, they're also being trained that their virginity is a one-time-only commodity so they're not learning to actually enjoy their body -- it's more like a mint-on-card action figure that can't be played with or else it will lose all of its value."

that's an excellent way to put it, mighty ponygirl.

I don't see why more people can't have mutual, adult discussions about marriage, come to an agreement, and have the creative/surprise/personal element be announcing it to friends & family or something like that.

Hee! This is just how my SO and I did it. However, I've found that when I explain this to people, they get all let down at the lack of "romance" in the "proposal." But I can't think of anything more romantic than us coming together and discussing our lives, deciding we want to spend them together, and proposing to each other to go the next step and fill out the paperwork.

For me it was way more romantic than my friends' stories of how they hinted at their SO's that they were ready, left clues to their ring sizes and preferences, then subtly pressured the men to make it "romantic." Then they would exclaim, "I was so surprised!"

I guess that their way worked for them. They got the romantic story they wanted. But I wouldn't trade a traditionally romantic story for the "unromantic" discussion (mostly done over the phone!) that I got.

wait so if i wear that first shirt virgins will want to have sex with me, right? sweet!

You know, the Madonna-Whore complex is awful, no doubt.

As a college student though, I've become bothered by another trend is well.

That is, that I feel like virgins /are/ stigmatized and that women with more sexual experience are preferred. So then there's all this pressure on women to perform sexually. I know kids who've indicated they won't want to be in a relationship with a woman unless she proves herself to be sufficiently sexually "adventurous"/skilled within the first few sessions. And these are intelligent young men I'm talking about. I also know that a majority of college-age men I've talked to said that they /wouldn't/ date a virgin.

How do we win?

The whole "you can't keep a bf unless you're good in bed" but you can't learn w/o having a bf thing seems so catch-22.

And even though I guess it's overall good that most young men really want to please their partners now, our culture's whole view of sex still just puts a whole lot of pressure on everyone, women included.

I couldn't help thinking how people would react to me wearing the Future Wife t-shirt. I think I'm a particularly non-wifey person so I guess it could be quite a fun to see people react. Although the piggy pink colour is a big no-no for me. It's almost my skin colour, would make me look fat:D

I actually have the Virgins are Hot t-shirt. I attended the national abstinence education conference last summer and they were selling those t-shirts, along with others. Of course, it does not compare to the *awesome* abstinence underwear I also bought. Hi-cut bikini white underwear with a stop sign logo and the phrase "no trespassing" underneath it. I'd like to add some subversive comment to the t-shirt, so suggestions are welcome!! The conf. was quite interesting to say the least. My masters thesis is about abstinence/feminist message of the modesty movement. For the record, I am a former abstinence-pusher turned pro comprehensive-sex ex advocate.

I kind of want this shirt so I can wear it ironically. The sad thing is, the abstinence-only folks at my school (harvard) have been getting a lot of publicity lately, so it might get taken seriously...

Are there any plans to offer "Future Martha" and "Future Handmaid" shirts as well?

Are there any plans to offer "Future Martha" and "Future Handmaid" shirts as well?

I don't see why more people can't have mutual, adult discussions about marriage, come to an agreement, and have the creative/surprise/personal element be announcing it to friends & family or something like that.

Mr. Nerd Alert and I also had an adult sit-down discussion about marriage, and then chose to have a small, intimate ceremony with only us and our parents, and people have been like, "WHA!?!?!!!...but, but, you..can't...without the puffy dress and the church choir and the wedding DJ! How sad for you!"
It pisses me off so much. Also, we spent less than $1000 on everything because we realize that it's not 1908. The whole wedding industry is so silly to me.

Oh lady do I ever want to get my boyfriend a "future wife" t-shirt, but it still won't be as awesome as the "fish SO HAPPY to be getting a bicycle" t-shirt from Cat and Girl.

Hey nerd et al.

I've always said that if I /did/ get married (which I'm not planning to) it would be in jeans on top of a mountain or somewhere else kind of rugged and beautiful, with just my sweety and I (and maybe a few good friends). That would be much more meaningful to me, I think...

I do think, though, that the wedding can be a big deal for a lot of people... A lot of the people I know for whom it's a big deal, grew up without much money, so the idea of having friends and family pool together money for a big ceremony for them with catered food and fancy clothes is sort of a big deal... I guess I can understand.

Hi-cut bikini white underwear with a stop sign logo and the phrase "no trespassing" underneath it.

This made my day.

"Hi-cut bikini white underwear with a stop sign logo and the phrase 'no trespassing' underneath it.

"This made my day."

I like it too, especially since it doesn't have to be an abstinence-only message. You know how some people who post "No Trespassing" signs on their yards still sometimes invite guests there...?

"I've always said that if I /did/ get married (which I'm not planning to) it would be in jeans on top of a mountain or somewhere else kind of rugged and beautiful, with just my sweety and I (and maybe a few good friends). That would be much more meaningful to me, I think..."

Cool. :)

That also reminds me of this:

http://www.mounteverest.net/story/NoMountaintoptoohigh,myLoveJun42005.shtml

"...Bride Moni Mulepati, 24, and groom Pem Dorjee Sherpa, 23, exchanged their vows at the summit of Everest on Monday. 'We were there only for 10 minutes, just enough for us to get married and our friends to take pictures of us,' Mulepati told The Associated Press on Friday..."

BTW, did anyone else see this?

http://www.boston.com/news/odd/articles/2008/04/10/indonesian_masseuses_lock_their_pants/

"JAKARTA, Indonesia—Massage parlors in an Indonesian town are asking their female masseuses to padlock their skirts and pants to make it clear that sex is not on offer.

"But the move has been protested by the women's affairs minister of Indonesia, where massage parlors are often a front for prostitution.

"'It is not the right way to prevent promiscuity,' Meutia Swasono was quoted as saying in Thursday's Jakarta Post. 'It insults women ... as if they are the ones in the wrong.'

"At least one parlor in the tourist town of Batu on Java island has required its masseuses to padlock their skirts or trousers to make it clear that the establishment does not tolerate prostitution.

"Others in the town started following suit after local officials suggested it was a good idea at a recent meeting with parlor owners. TV footage and photos have shown several masseuses with small padlocks in the zip of their pants or skirts in recent days.

"'The padlocking phenomena has been seen at various parlors and it is something we like,' said Imam Suryono, the head of the town's public order authority. He denied media reports that he had formally ordered them to wear padlocks.

"It was not immediately possible to contact Swasono for comment."

Nina, same with me.
I cannot imagine myself other than single but my mom came to the age when she started publicly elaborating the details of my wedding, the main idea being The whole town will talk about it. Yuck.
Maybe I should get myself some t-shirt to show an attitude.

Ninapendamaishi, I understand your frustration; I am also a college student and I've never before realized how screwed up sexual attitudes can be. However, I would hesitate to condemn the guys who have expressed that they wouldn't like to date a virgin. I can completely sympathize with a sexually active person who would hesitate to date a person who doesn't wish to have sex. Personally, the sexual part of a relationship is vital to me; I feel that it is (I mean only for me PERSONALLY) an important component of a satisfying relationship. If every man in the world felt that way, we'd have a problem. But I don't take issue with this feeling on a person-to-person basis.