Quite a lot of those comments do make me sick, but at least a good chunk seemed to realize that the very premise of the video was ridiculous and commented appropriately...

Regardless, Digg is still generally a cesspool.

Stuff like this has made me skeptical & wary of the men I encounter in everyday life. I don't trust even the ones who *seem* nice because under the shield of anonymity, even the normal-seeming men will unleash torrents of vile misogyny. So I pretty much have to assume that most of the men I meet (or pass by on the street) harbor an intense, if not hidden, hatred of women.

I presume that video was faked, although there is a small, small chance that it was the person's first time in a large vehicle. The first time I rented a cargo truck I was not happy about having to back it out of the parking spot and if my friends had video taped it, the video would have made for a good laugh.

Many of the comments on the site were rude and stereotypical sexist comments that lacked imagination or thought. However I must thank SarahMC for reassuring me that while women may at times use more eloquent wording, that sexist thought and sweeping generalizations is not limited to just a portion of my gender.

Shorter Ephemeral: It wasn't real and anyway since SarahMC did it, it follows that all women do the exact same thing and that makes it excusable for a portion of my gender to do it too--neener, neener.

"However I must thank SarahMC for reassuring me that while women may at times use more eloquent wording, that sexist thought and sweeping generalizations is not limited to just a portion of my gender."

Sexist thoughts and sweeping generalizations? Perhaps you don’t know the definition of sexism. When you often run into misogynist pigs all the time on the internet (and it’s not just on Digg) it is pretty logical to come to the conclusion that a lot of the supposedly normal guys that you run into in everyday life are in fact misogynist pigs, who will only dare reveal their nature when anonymous. The conclusion that most men in fact despise women is pretty logical given the entire history of patriarchy.

Well, the problem is just that women aren't agressive or decisive enough to drive.

For example:

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=41edd5bdb5

The new public sphere of the internet - once thought of as a potential utopia of free expression - follows the same rules as the public sphere offline. In my M.A. thesis, I explored the ways in which sexism is operating online. Unfortunately, anonymity allows individuals to say those sexist/racist/classist/sizeist/etc online things that would be "inappropriate" in offline conversation. I think it's important to explore why the web is such a "wild wild west" of misogyny et al. as well looking at how such negative attitudes limit individuals who ar discriminated against from fully participating in cyberspace.

I can't even explain how frustrated I am by the comments made on that site. As a woman driver, and someone who is very interested in cars/fixing them etc. I have made one of my hobbies learning and fixing cars. I know more about them than alot of my male friends, and help them WITH their cars... but when I go to car shows and try to hold a conversation with someone (mostly male) they treat me like I'm 5. It's terrible!! And I have so many MALE and FEMALE friends that think that women are terrible drivers. Oh women can't back up, oh they can't parallel park, etc. It's very frustrating! I think that I am reasonably good at driving, I can maneuver my car very well, I parallel park every day etc. but, just like everyone male and female alike, I do make mistakes driving. Last weekend I was going to my friend's art show downtown, and had needed to park in this lot... which was all parallel parking. The MALE security guard was like 'oh you need to make sure you are parked IN the yellow box or you'll be towed." I could not SEE a yellow box, and parallel parked anyway where I thought it would be (based on other cars in the lot) and he came up to the glass, motioned me to roll my window down and said he would 'walk me through it' ... when I was done and got out of my car I saw that the line was sooooo faded that it would have been impossible for me to see it while inside my car in the dark! All the security guard did was roll his eyes at me and tsk tsk tsk as my fiance and I walked in. I felt so undermined and so stupid... knowing that the security guard was thinking 'oh what a dumb girl' or something else regarding my driving... maybe I'm just stereotyping, but I think that if the security guard was female, I wouldn't have felt like that.

Ephemeral, you are right to note that, tragically, women can be sexist too. In fact, tons of women are sexist against women, even. Not being piggish is a challenge for everyone living in a sexism steeped society.

Having said that, go a bit easier on SarahMC, whose reaction to seeing her gender abused is completely natural. Being active on the internet is enough to instill a bit of fear in a lot of women. Take, for example, the Google searches that get some people to feminist sites. We've gotten some really disturbing ones (like "powerful women being raped") and even some sorta funny ones (like "sexual breast pumping").

"The conclusion that most men in fact despise women is pretty logical given the entire history of patriarchy."

That's a pretty bleak world-view. I prefer to solve the problem when I see it rather than look for it everywhere. I've met a reasonable number of decent men as a result.

I actually had an experience relating to this this past summer - I had to back out of a 20 foot driveway after leaving a picnic, and one of the random guys in charge of parking approached me and told me he would back my car out. As a good driver, (taught by my mother, at that) I was SO offended. I don't come into contact with too much sexism in my day to day life, but that blew me away.

Another time I was trying to parallel park and these two guys in a car across the road kept staring, and staring, and staring, and it was so distracting that it took me ages to park. (And, in fact, as soon as they left it was easy.) Classic case of stereotype threat.

What utter crap. How a penis makes a man a better driver is really beyond me.

My significant other will always defer to my superior driving skills, and be thankful for them. The simple fact is that it depends on a. where a person learned to drive, b. how often he or she drives, and c. what kind of traffic he or she is used to.

I'm female, I learned to drive on the L.A. freeways and in downtown San Diego, I drive every day for work, and drive usually in heavy traffic.

So - somehow a penis-wielding, bicyclist from a small town is going to outdo me in parallel parking? Uh-huh. Thought not.

Ok, that is so funny now that I re-read it. There isn't any wielding going on. Sorry for the mental picture none of us needed. ;)

I love driving. When I had a car, I had a reputation for taking the best care of it. I checked steering/brake/oil fluids all the time. My favorite object was - whatever it's called in English, the air pressure measure thing for the tires. I even cleaned the upholstery every other week. And my driving - well, only one ticket in 10 years, and that was on a 25 hr drive south. I think driving has to do a lot with balance. Being both aggressive and passive. It's nice to once in a while, you know, let someone else ahead. Just like it's nice to slow down an ass tailing you.
The whole make-up while driving thing is pointless, see - men and women text and read and do all kinds of crazy shit when they should be alert. The comment about women being on cell phones is just stupid - what? Men are never yapping away while driving? But of course, managing such a heavy piece of machinery is inherently masculine, and one woman failing at driving indicates that all women are failures at it.

On Sarah's comment. I think we had this discussion not too long ago about the difference between "most" and "some" and to be fair, while I do agree that it is a bleak world-view, I too am guilty of that perspective. The level of vitriol directed at women on the internet leaves me wondering just who says and believes these things when I am out and about every day. You know, I blamed myself a lot for thinking that way, not giving most guys the benefit of the doubt, but I gotta say, taking into account everything (and I mean everything - my experiences, other women in my life, just plain old living) it's fucking hard. And the real good guys, well, way too often they are complacent because they remain silent.
In any event, I have yet to decide what is worse - the fact that these comments are made to begin with, or the fact that I find it more common for them to be expressed openly via video reponses (thus, bringing up the point that these guys feel comfortable even when anonymity is removed so we can see the asshole behind the sentiments).

I am in absolute agreement with you SarahMC. Couple the online behavior with the CONSTANT, NEVER-ENDING harassment that I get in real life from men, makes me truly think that many men (note the use of the word many, people) do indeed harbor an intense hatred of women.

This actually reminds me of a time that I unsubscribed from a message board, and I received the following automated unsubscribe message:

(TRIGGER WARNING)

-------------

You are a toad fucker. I am going to stab you in the face and then
rape the hole with a dremel whose battery is dying. YEAH THAT'S RIGHT
I WENT THERE, LOW SPEED RAPE OF A FACE WOUND WITH A POWER TOOL.

------------

I can't even explain how awful I felt after receiving it, especially since I knew this person in real life.

So being personally affected by anti-woman sexism & calling it out for what it is = sexist?

This reminds me of the whole "gender card" issue. According to some people, a woman is "pulling the gender card" whenever she calls out misogyny / sexism and identifies it by name. Just another way of keeping women silent and complacent in the face of violent hatred.

YF, that's classy.
You knew him in real life? Did he know this?

I just prefer to stick to particulars rather than make sweeping generalizations. As in this case: many of the commenters on the car board are particularly sexist and deserve to be called out for it. I wouldn't say you're being sexist for feeling hopeless about the matter, but I don't know how constructive the hopelessness is.

Sgzax, it's not like I don't live my life or associate with men. But knowing that anonymity gives some men the freedom to safely spew misogyny, I can't help but wonder whether the men I encounter in daily situations hate women as well. The guy at the check-out counter who smiles and says 'good morning' might go home to his computer to send rape threats on message boards. I'm just saying it makes me wonder... I don't have to give every single man the benefit of the doubt when it's pretty fucking clear to me that A LOT (not all) of men harbor A LOT of misogyny.

Where did this idea that women are worse drivers than men come from anyway? If this were true, car insurance rates for women would be higher. The reality is the opposite, until the age of 25 or so, when the rates equal out (I think it's crap that all males are penalized because more males than females get in accidents).

I have never personally known a woman that has had her license revoked or suspended for too many accidents/tickets. I have never known a woman who had to carry "high-risk" car insurance because of too many accidents/tickets. One of these has happened to just about every man I have known at least once in their lives (with the exception of my father and my husband). These same men make jokes about women being bad drivers. Hmmmm....

As another commenter pointed out, driving/parking/backing up are all learned skills. It takes care and practice to build the confidence to do those things well, male or female.

SarahMC - I total get what you are saying. Are the men I work with the ones posting these sexist comments? Just how many of the men I see and interact daily are harboring this sort of hatred toward women? Taking into consideration my own personal experiences and the regularity of comments like those (internet and real world), I assume most men are sexist until I see otherwise.

SarahMC - I get your point, and entirely recognise the problem you refer to. Sadly, misogynists aren't obliged to wear badges identifying themselves as such, so often you just don't realise what views are held by the people you see around you every day.

However - let's not forget, that goes both ways. Some of the men around you may be staunch feminists (or pro-feminist males) who've just never said anything about it in public. You'll never know unless you ask.

(I'm afraid to say I pretty much fall into that category myself: although my personal beliefs are strongly feminist, I just don't do enough to express them in public.)

Yes, many men *are* deeply misogynistic, but that doesn't mean you should live in despair and fear from them all your life. If you do, you're basically letting them win, by acting as though their views really are as commonplace as they'd like to believe.

In my experience, that's simply not the case - maybe it's because I'm not a woman, but I've almost never encountered those sort of attitudes among other men, even in private. I think the loudness and unpleasantness of the misogynists disguises how outnumbered they are, and that there really are many more pro-feminist men than you might think.

(I don't mean to undermine the seriousness of misogyny, which is obviously still a hugely important problem in the world today. But I just honestly don't think that the repulsive comments on that digg video accurately reflect the views of men as a whole.

And ultimately, if you live your life assuming all men are sexist pigs by default, you'll never meet the very many of us who aren't.)

Sarah MC, I know exactly what you mean. I try to assume the best about people until I know otherwise, but after this semester, I've had to reconsider that outlook. I'm reading a book for my yoga class right now where the author says (I shit you not) that women are more superficial than men because their vaginas can fit any penis, and that they are always searching for something to fill their "emptiness", which, according to the author, only a man can fill. Then there was also the comment the author's guru made about how it's obvious we're in the Kali yuga (age of ignorance) because women are driving cars. Ugh, it's so infuriating!

And the worst part? All of the men in my class (and a few women) that I've talked to (except one) other person that they think the book is wonderful and they don't see a problem with it. I told them, "The problem is that the author is very openly misogynist." One of my classmates responded, "But Svoboda is "into" the Goddess." And my reply should have been, "Yeah, and the Pope is "into" the Virgin Mary, but he still put a ban on birth control." But I chose to maintain the peace of the classroom environment, which was stupid of me in retrospect. I should have spoken up, but I'm going to have to deal with these idiots for another month and a half, so I figured it would be better if I just kept my mouth shut.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make in this little ramble is that while I try my damndest not to make such assumptions like that, when you go to a school that is supposedly a safe environment for all genders and sexual orientations (Naropa is really into maintaining a safe environment...there are signs all over the school with the little rainbow triangles on them) and you still encounter sexism, it's hard not to make that assumption.

Sorry if this was long >.

Sarah MC, I know exactly what you mean. I try to assume the best about people until I know otherwise, but after this semester, I've had to reconsider that outlook. I'm reading a book for my yoga class right now where the author says (I shit you not) that women are more superficial than men because their vaginas can fit any penis, and that they are always searching for something to fill their "emptiness", which, according to the author, only a man can fill. Then there was also the comment the author's guru made about how it's obvious we're in the Kali yuga (age of ignorance) because women are driving cars. Ugh, it's so infuriating!

And the worst part? All of the men in my class (and a few women) that I've talked to (except one) other person that they think the book is wonderful and they don't see a problem with it. I told them, "The problem is that the author is very openly misogynist." One of my classmates responded, "But Svoboda is "into" the Goddess." And my reply should have been, "Yeah, and the Pope is "into" the Virgin Mary, but he still put a ban on birth control." But I chose to maintain the peace of the classroom environment, which was stupid of me in retrospect. I should have spoken up, but I'm going to have to deal with these idiots for another month and a half, so I figured it would be better if I just kept my mouth shut.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make in this little ramble is that while I try my damndest not to make such assumptions like that, when you go to a school that is supposedly a safe environment for all genders and sexual orientations (Naropa is really into maintaining a safe environment...there are signs all over the school with the little rainbow triangles on them) and you still encounter sexism, it's hard not to make that assumption.

Sorry if this was long >.

Sarah MC, I know exactly what you mean. I try to assume the best about people until I know otherwise, but after this semester, I've had to reconsider that outlook. I'm reading a book for my yoga class right now where the author says (I shit you not) that women are more superficial than men because their vaginas can fit any penis, and that they are always searching for something to fill their "emptiness", which, according to the author, only a man can fill. Then there was also the comment the author's guru made about how it's obvious we're in the Kali yuga (age of ignorance) because women are driving cars. Ugh, it's so infuriating!

And the worst part? All of the men in my class (and a few women) that I've talked to (except one) think the book is wonderful and they don't see a problem with it. I told them, "The problem is that the author is very openly misogynist." One of my classmates responded, "But Svoboda is "into" the Goddess." And my reply should have been, "Yeah, and the Pope is "into" the Virgin Mary, but he still put a ban on birth control." But I chose to maintain the peace of the classroom environment, which was stupid of me in retrospect. I should have spoken up, but I'm going to have to deal with these idiots for another month and a half, so I figured it would be better if I just kept my mouth shut.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make in this little ramble is that while I try my damndest not to make such assumptions like that, when you go to a school that is supposedly a safe environment for all genders and sexual orientations (Naropa is really into maintaining a safe environment...there are signs all over the school with the little rainbow triangles on them) and you still encounter sexism, it's hard not to make that assumption.

Sorry if this was long >.

Sarah MC, I know exactly what you mean. I try to assume the best about people until I know otherwise, but after this semester, I've had to reconsider that outlook. I'm reading a book for my yoga class right now where the author says (I shit you not) that women are more superficial than men because their vaginas can fit any penis, and that they are always searching for something to fill their "emptiness", which, according to the author, only a man can fill. Then there was also the comment the author's guru made about how it's obvious we're in the Kali yuga (age of ignorance) because women are driving cars. Ugh, it's so infuriating!

And the worst part? All of the men in my class (and a few women) that I've talked to (except one) think the book is wonderful and they don't see a problem with it. I told them, "The problem is that the author is very openly misogynist." One of my classmates responded, "But Svoboda is "into" the Goddess." And my reply should have been, "Yeah, and the Pope is "into" the Virgin Mary, but he still put a ban on birth control." But I chose to maintain the peace of the classroom environment, which was stupid of me in retrospect. I should have spoken up, but I'm going to have to deal with these idiots for another month and a half, so I figured it would be better if I just kept my mouth shut.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make in this little ramble is that while I try my damndest not to make such assumptions like that, when you go to a school that is supposedly a safe environment for all genders and sexual orientations (Naropa is really into maintaining a safe environment...there are signs all over the school with the little rainbow triangles on them) and you still encounter sexism, it's hard not to make that assumption.

Sorry if this was long >.

Dear Lord, Danielle.

I...just have no words. Women are more superficial than men because our vaginas can fit any penis? I...what? First of all, we're not...and second...um, I don't know how to put this, but...some are better fits than others, if you know what I mean. I mean, I can put a tampon in there, but it's not sexually fulfilling. That just sounds like a man trying to reassure himself that his size doesn't matter, and then somehow blaming women for that. It's just...wrong on every conceivable level.

And..."emptiness"? I always found that to be the least believable part of Ulysses, if you don't mind me digressing, where Molly thinks about how weird it is that women are made with a hole in them. But...we're not. I just wonder how ignorant these writers are about female anatomy. It's not like we're walking around empty. At rest, the vagina isn't...hanging open. And it's not like men don't have mouths and other orifices that are "empty" in their regular state.

Sarah MC, I know exactly what you mean. I try to assume the best about people until I know otherwise, but after this semester, I've had to reconsider that outlook. I'm reading a book for my yoga class right now where the author says (I shit you not) that women are more superficial than men because their vaginas can fit any penis, and that they are always searching for something to fill their "emptiness", which, according to the author, only a man can fill. Then there was also the comment the author's guru made about how it's obvious we're in the Kali yuga (age of ignorance) because women are driving cars. Ugh, it's so infuriating!

And the worst part? All of the men in my class (and a few women) that I've talked to (except one) other person that they think the book is wonderful and they don't see a problem with it. I told them, "The problem is that the author is very openly misogynist." One of my classmates responded, "But Svoboda is "into" the Goddess." And my reply should have been, "Yeah, and the Pope is "into" the Virgin Mary, but he still put a ban on birth control." But I chose to maintain the peace of the classroom environment, which was stupid of me in retrospect. I should have spoken up, but I'm going to have to deal with these idiots for another month and a half, so I figured it would be better if I just kept my mouth shut.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make in this little ramble is that while I try my damndest not to make such assumptions like that, when you go to a school that is supposedly a safe environment for all genders and sexual orientations (Naropa is really into maintaining a safe environment...there are signs all over the school with the little rainbow triangles on them) and you still encounter sexism, it's hard not to make that assumption.

Sorry if this was long >.

Shit. I'm so sorry >.

Jem,
Yeah, we were friends in real life before I subscribed to the message board that he maintains. Needless to say, that message has definitely cooled the relationship.

Digg is mainly composed of angry teen boys, anti-social nerds of all ages, and trolls. I guess if you want to find something to get righteously angry about, Digg comments are the right place to look. Other than that, it's pretty much worthless.

Well, those angry teen boys grow into men, who are still angry and hate women...

So a few days ago, I had a super disappointing conversation with one of my friends (whose girlfriend I'm also friends with, and she's pretty feminist) and he basically said that if a guy sleeps with a girl on the first time they meet, she's a slut, but guys can't be sluts. Seriously, I've known him for like 2 years and I thought he was more enlightened than that.

On Monday, we had a birthday party at my office for 3 people, and they were all cutting the cake together. Then one guy said "I can't do this, I suck at cutting cake" and our supervisor was like "best to let the women handle it, they're better at that stuff." WTF???? You're right, my vagina automatically makes me a culinary expert. in fact, why did I even go into the office? I should just have stayed back in the kitchen where I belong.

Also on Sunday I had a conversation with a guy who told me he's completely against feminism because he thinks women have reached equality and patriarchy doesn't exist anymore and all the feminists he knows are about creating a matriarchy. I didn't tell him off because I was shocked that he was able to use the word "patriarchy" but seriously, what kind of non-permeable sand does your head have to be in in order to believe that we've actually achieved social, political and economic equality? I also told him that my feminism isn't about creating a matriarchy...since I don't believe anyone should be in power based on what they're born with (a penis, a vagina, light skin, dark skin, etc.)

And those angry boys/men don't actually exist outside the Internet? Come on. Just because things are said online doesn't mean the people saying those things don't LIVE in the same world we do.

I agree with SarahMC. They are out there among us, they just don't say these things out loud very often. And it makes me wonder how many closet racists and homophobes are out there also.
But somehow, making a sweeping generalization of a whole ethnic group or sexual orientation online seems more openly offensive, right? Bashing women is so ingrained in our culture, we don't even question it. These guys aren't sexist, they're "venting." And not calling them on their "venting" makes even the most pro-woman guy complicit, in my opinion. After all, if someone is making outrageous racist or homophobic remarks in front of you, and you didn't share those views, you wouldn't just pat them on the back and say, "it's okay, that black person/gay person must have really hurt you, so go ahead and indict every black/gay in the world?" You're not really a bigot, just "misguided."
Riiight. Blech.

^^

Problem is, that's exactly what SarahMC is doing. Just assuming that most, or "a LOT" of men are a certain way, based on her limited experience.

If someone said "most" or "a LOT" of feminists/women did something/thought something/were a certain way, there would be a great lot of anger and people saying how wrong that person was.

Just because it's men you're making a generalization about doesn't make it any less sexist.

DocEss, do you not READ the horror stories on Feministing? Go read the one about teenage gang rapists and tell me that women aren't fighting an uphill battle against widespread, violent misogyny in this world.

What are we supposed to do? Soak it all in and not let it affect our views of men?

Yes, Sarah, that is exactly what we're supposed to do. Because these guys don't hate women, they're just "venting."

AAHHHGGGHH!!! This is what absolutely sends me into orbit.....these stupid, smug macho commenters!!. The driver in question did it perfectly!! Did any of those snotty bastards notice that there was less than the CAR LENGTH of her car for room to manoever? She didn't obstruct anyone?? She accepted help from someone better able to see the situation?? EVERYTHING a competent, safe driver is SUPPOSED to do!?!

I'm sorry, but I hate them. I've always hated them.

And DocEss, LIMITED experience?!? Good god, I am male and I see this constantly EVERYDAY!!! LIMITED EXPERIENCE!??!

And I hope it didn't escape notice the "ads" around the little video: " Asian Girls for Marriage", "Beautiful Russian Women", "Meet Sexy Ladies", "Meet Hotties". Ya think there is a pattern here?!?

I worked here with a woman whom I admired greatly for things like intelligence, talent, great person to talk to, you know, all that squishy girly stuff. We are in an industrial setting here and this "girl" backed a 2-1/2 ton dual axle stake bed truck into a space I couldn't have backed a Volkswagen into. Absolute mastery and precision. She hated doing it, she thought the job irrelevant ( true) and pointlessly annoying.

But she did it. Effortlessly.
Nancy, in case it ever comes up again.

I had to say something. Edit or delete as you will.

AAHHHGGGHH!!! This is what absolutely sends me into orbit.....these stupid, smug macho commenters!!. The driver in question did it perfectly!! Did any of those snotty bastards notice th