There's nothing good about this story, but it's a good illustration because no one can say it's just her word against the boy's. The article states: "When the 16-year-old male was arrested during a class at the Porter County Career Center, he admitted making the comment, according to police, and he regretted it because it visibly upset the girl."

"Well, gosh, officer, when I said it, it never occurred to me that being threatened with rape would be upsetting to someone. I mean, it's just a joke, right? Ha ha?"

OF COURSE we live in a rape culture. Please -- please!! -- take note of the cartoon at CCSU. The student newspaper, The Recorder, -- the same folks who brought us the piece "Rape Only Hurts If You Fight It" -- has published a cartoon about forcing a 14-year-old Latina to drink urine while trapped behind a chained and padlocked door. This is NOT funny. Students at CCSU are mobilizing, but the story needs attention.

the cartoon is on line -- http://clubs.ccsu.edu/recorder/currentissue.pdf -- it is on the final page of the paper.

Please help get the word out. Thanks!

http://video.nbc30.com/player/?id=156401

Here's a news clip on the aforementioned cartoon.

This incident happened in the same town as my undergrad as well as where I currently work at a Domestic Violence Shelter. This town seriously has its head in it's ass when it comes to what's really happening in the town. I have heard town police officers say that "most people who file rape cases are lying and if you keep talking to them enough you'll learn the truth". This town's High School also turned down our offer to come in and lead anti bullying seminars because "they don't have that problem."
The campus police are no better saying things to women like "if you are raped please come to us but we cannot tell you that there will be no repurcussions if you admit to willingly drinking" Or "you're lucky it's just us arresting you, you could have gotten raped walking home alone"

UGH, sorry I have massive repressed aggression about the way some things happen there.

Hey Prof/Activist--we're planning on posting about that, so slow your roll! ;)

dig, Jessica. But a feminist's gotta get the message out -- you surely understand!!! with righteous feminist love, prof/activist

When I was a kid, another boy at the YMCA day care I was staying at told me that if I told another girl his real name, he would rape me.

Of course, I didn't take him seriously until he started chasing me. Luckily, I got a counselor before he could try anything. Unfortunately, I think he got a time out and was told to stay away from me the rest of the day.

He was 13 and I was 12, so I can see where an adult might not take it too seriously in this culture. But I am glad to see that this kid got more that my bully got. Maybe it means we are making progress after all when these assholes can get a jail sentence.

--"Well, gosh, officer, when I said it, it never occurred to me that being threatened with rape would be upsetting to someone. I mean, it's just a joke, right? Ha ha?"--

It's shocking at ingrained the "rape joke" is in society. Even my husband, knowing full well that in my junior year of high school, my then-boyfriend decided that my adamant "no" was just me being coy.

It doesn't stop him from saying "oh, I will RAPE you" when he's playing a video game and gets upset at the other players. My asking him to stop, my telling him flat-out, "that isn't appropriate", doesn't curb it at all.

It's taken years for me to be able to just ignore rape jokes. You'd be surprised - or maybe you wouldn't - at how many times one encounters a reminder of this rape culture, EVERY SINGLE DAY.

A male friend of mine made a "silence implies consent" joke once. We hadn't known each other very long, so I tried to cut him a little slack, but I immediately went ice cold with him. Made it perfectly clear that I found that offensive on a feminist level and horribly upsetting on a personal level. He apologized profusely and hasn't said anything at all like that since.

Of course, he may just be more trainable than most. The other day I got him to admit that paternalism is the same thing as misogyny. I ranted a little, and he was smiling, so I accused him of laughing at me. He said, "No, I'm just trying to think of some way that you're wrong, but...I can't."

Yay for men learning things!

Female runners are subjected to harassment every day, from sexual comments yelled out of cars, to being followed, to having cars try to hit them, to sexual assault. I had a man slow down his car and theatrically stick out his tongue and make licking motions at me just this morning. That's a mild occurrence. An acquaintance of mine in CT was deliberately run off the road a week or so ago, she had to jump into some bushes to avoid being hit by a man alone in a pickup truck. A friend of mine in Los Angeles was grabbed by a man when she was passing a bus stop earlier this year, while running in the dark, early one morning. She fought him off, but she and the police figured he was waiting for the first woman alone to approach the bus stop. And this was on a major roadway, but it was quiet at that very early hour.

I'm not going to let these sort of things stop me from running, or force me to bring my husband with me, but I never run with headphones, and I'm very aware of everything that goes on around me. Luckily, 99% of the people I see every day are friendly and supportive. I guess a woman alone, out making herself strong, not wearing a lot of clothing, is just too much for some men to handle.

I bet rape jokes won't seem so funny when he ages out of the juvie system and gets sent to a real prison, as it seems he's on the path to.

I had an exercise/eating disorder in middle school--could NOT keep up that torturous shit--and used to run an hour and half a day or more (how I kept my grades up....enh, I had no social life, that's why!)

I was constantly catcalled, laughed at (I looked like shit when I ran...wore clothes I was willing to sweat/ruin, no make-up, etc.) but the worst were these two drunk college guys I saw at least three times in one shitty summer night. First time, they laughed at me and started jogging behind me,yelling "Run, run!" An hour later, I ran into them again on the street; they blocked me and one of them made like they were going to grab me.

Finally, going back to my lobby, I heard someone yelling at the top of their lungs, "RUN!RUN!RUN!" from a balcony. They were in the apartment building next door.

It was mild, my neighborhood is safe, and I never saw them again, but it was humiliating, at least. I was 14.

This story is really f*cked up and sad....but as someone else has said, unsurprising

BluePencils is right about running and sexual harassment. Guys feel entitled to yell lewd comments from their cars, gesture, and even cut runners off at crosswalks to lean out the windows. I remember this especially from when I ran cross-country... it actually happens LESS when I run alone, and I am not sure why that is. I stick to running on campus, where I have never been shouted or gestured at.

It is extremely disturbing that a significant number of guys REALLY DO THINK that this behavior is PERFECTLY OKAY. They know that it makes women uncomforatble and sometimes afraid, but they still think that they're within their rights and not actually "threatening" us.

Harassment while jogging is exactly why I jog early in the morning when it's still mostly dark out and almost nobody is up. I've had to weigh the slightly increased risk of being attacked against the unavoidable fact of being harassed if I jog in the early evening instead. Life in rape culture can suck sometimes.

When I was younger I used to dream of the wonderful future day when I would become invisible to adolescent men, thinking that they were the only perpetrators. I was wrong.

starknut,
I know exactly what you mean about "rape" and gaming. Male gamers use that language ALL THE TIME! And when I used to frequent shoryukne.com forums it was extremely frequent. I tried to tell them how offensive it was I got "it's just a joke". Yeah cause rape is just so funny!

I also had an inssue with their love of violence aganist women (that they found hilarious, but couldn't explain why) and violence aganist childre (lots of dead babie jokes).

Wait a minute. The guy yelled the rape comment on Wednesday, Sept. 5. On Thursday (the next day!?), he and his friends yelled comments at the girls again.

I call bullshit. If he were sorry for yelling the rape comment, he wouldn't have come around for a second chance. He's sorry for getting caught, not for harrassing and upsetting the girls.

Not to devalue the negative impact of rape and the fact that it seems to be commonly devalued...

But wouldn't you all agree that if you're going to try and socially resensitize our culture to the meaning of the word, shouldn't we do the same with other horrible things?

For example, how often have you heard "I'm going to kill you!" said jokingly, and thought nothing of it? Is rape so much worse than murder?

I think that there needs to be a reevaluation of a great many things wrong with our culture, and a joking attitude to rape is only one of them.

I completely agree with Crotchfire. This behavior is heinous, but I don't think it would have been taken as seriously if he had yelled "I'm going to kill you!" to the girl. Joking about any kind of violence is a sick thing to do... I think it's unfortunate that rape has to be the topic of the "joke" before it's taken seriously.

When I was in highschool, a guy in a class I took had told me, "I'm gonna fuckin' kill you, bitch," after I had "tattled" on him when he stole over $1000 from the school cafeteria. Not only was I distressed that the school didn't protect my identity when I turned him in, but NOBODY took me seriously when I had told them about this threat. He ended up brutally raping my thirteen-year-old sister later that year in an unrelated incident--I wouldn't have put it past him to have killed me if he thought he could get away with it, but all the school authorities dismissed it as as joke when I told them about it. I think it's shocking that these sorts of "jokes" are acceptable in any form, whether they refer directly to sexual assault or not.

Crotchfire, personally, I try not to even say THAT. "I'm going to kill you" or even "I hate you". I think people don't really give it much thought, but I did - or my grandmother did, and made me think about it, too.

So, yes, I do agree with you.

Well, I don't really see how saying we're against joking about rape must automatically mean we're okay with joking about killing people. It's just that this happens to be a blog entry about a man who threatened to rape a 12-year-old.

Does anybody else find it really sad that because of this incident and the previous one where some fucker hit and injured one of the girls with a paintball gun, the police are now notified of where and when the team runs? Even in a group of 100, girls can't be safe because too many fuckers just think of them as sexual prey.

BluePencils - I suddenly understand why people buy treadmills. Do you (other runners on here, too) bring a whistle or one of those personal alarm things?

Crotchfire - I'm not saying it's right, but I think the difference between saying "I'm going to rape you" and "I'm going to kill you" (in a TRULY non-threatening way, not like Delirium's experience) is that rape is more specific, and overwhelmingly a crime against women. Killing has always been taken seriously, and for the most part only defense attorneys play the 'blame-the-victim' game; with rape there are still parts of the world where the woman (or even girl) who is raped is not only blamed, she's punished. (See the Wikipedia entry on Atefah Sahaaleh for an example.) Again, I'm not saying it's right, I'm just putting a theory out there.

One more thing -

What do you all think the effect of the show Special Victims Unit has been on the 'rape culture'. Does it desenitize us or humanize the problem? I don't have an answer, so I'm wondering if anyone else has an opinion about it.

"Well, gosh, officer, when I said it, it never occurred to me that being threatened with rape would be upsetting to someone. I mean, it's just a joke, right? Ha ha?"

Kimmy, you couldn't have possibly phrased my sentiments any better.

This doesn't suprise me in the least. I remember when I was 11 (in 6th grade), I was walking home from school and these 16 year-old boys shouted, "Hey, this guy says he wants to fuck you" from across the park I was cutting through to go home. I heard stories like this one (the 16 year old boy @ the 6th grade runner) all the time in high school, and no one ever thought anything of it. In fact, my friend's parents, and mine, told us we'd better get used to it because we were young and beautiful. It's such bullshit. Nobody should have to deal with harassment by virtue of being young and pretty.

"I think the difference between saying "I'm going to rape you" and "I'm going to kill you" (in a TRULY non-threatening way, not like Delirium's experience) is that rape is more specific, and overwhelmingly a crime against women. Killing has always been taken seriously, and for the most part only defense attorneys play the 'blame-the-victim' game; with rape there are still parts of the world where the woman (or even girl) who is raped is not only blamed, she's punished."

I totally agree with you here, violetlightning.

Also, it must be pointed out that murder is a lot less doable, in a purely practical sense, than sexual assault. For most 12-year-olds, saying, "I'm gonna kill you" is like saying, "I'm gonna kick you to the moon". Not happening, and they know it.

violetlightning, I personally find a lot on that show incredibly disturbing but I think that has made me more sensitive to rape, in the sense that I used to be inclined towards the "she shouldn't have put herself in that situation in the first place" kind of thinking and now I believe it is horrific no matter what. It helped me to humanize the victim, to see them as more than a person who had been violated and to realize that it's very rarely as cut and dried as the media would have us believe.... That's not all because of SVU but it certainly played a part.

I was thinking earlier today about sexual assault statistics...and while not trying to lump verbage in with horrendous actions like molestation and rape, I think the generally accepted statistics are wrong because while you'll hear something like "25% reported, 75% actual" women are sexually assaulted...I think lewd catcalls and such like everything mentioned in the response here kind of fits in the sexual assault category. I'm willing to bet every woman I know has had some sort of unwanted sexual advance, whether it be catcall, pick up lines, or even someone who means well (who likes you) and just tries to kiss you even though you've tried making it obvious the attentions aren't wanted. To the point it even makes them uncomfortable. Basically I'm trying to say probably just about every woman in the United States has been sexually assaulted at some point, even if it doesn't really seem like what happened was a big deal. Or at least, I think thats the way people need to start looking at things before we can get the point across that talk like this simply is not acceptable. I don't think men should think they can just say whatever is on their mind regarding hooking up with the opposite sex. I don't think either gender should do it. If society scorned people making sexual advances without having a good reason (such as having spoken to a person and sensed a sort of interest) or even the mockery of it ("hey baby" as you're driving by in your car) it would go a long way in stopping disturbing things like this.

I hope that all made sense.

I love SVU. I think they do a damn good job of showing people something that makes them uncomfortable, and it's good that something serious is interjected into the mediocrity of "dramatic" television.

I was thinking earlier today about sexual assault statistics...and while not trying to lump verbage in with horrendous actions like molestation and rape, I think the generally accepted statistics are wrong because while you'll hear something like "25% reported, 75% actual" women are sexually assaulted...I think lewd catcalls and such like everything mentioned in the response here kind of fits in the sexual assault category. I'm willing to bet every woman I know has had some sort of unwanted sexual advance, whether it be catcall, pick up lines, or even someone who means well (who likes you) and just tries to kiss you even though you've tried making it obvious the attentions aren't wanted. To the point it even makes them uncomfortable. Basically I'm trying to say probably just about every woman in the United States has been sexually assaulted at some point, even if it doesn't really seem like what happened was a big deal. Or at least, I think thats the way people need to start looking at things before we can get the point across that talk like this simply is not acceptable. I don't think men should think they can just say whatever is on their mind regarding hooking up with the opposite sex. I don't think either gender should do it. If society scorned people making sexual advances without having a good reason (such as having spoken to a person and sensed a sort of interest) or even the mockery of it ("hey baby" as you're driving by in your car) it would go a long way in stopping disturbing things like this.

I hope that all made sense.

I love SVU. I think they do a damn good job of showing people something that makes them uncomfortable, and it's good that something serious is interjected into the mediocrity of "dramatic" television.

God, some of the comments about rape jokes among gamers hit really close to home. When I was a freshman in college two male friends of mine were... I forget, beating me at a video game or something, and they thought it was HI-LARIOUS to write "Nicole got RAPED!" followed by some l33tspeak on the whiteboard outside my room. They used the "it's just a joke/it doesn't mean that" excuse on me when I was confused and offended by the language. They actually made ME feel oversensitive for having a problem with it -- I had to explain quickly erasing it by lying that my parents were coming over later and might not "get it".

I still don't get it myself!

Another thing: Something that fascinates me is the cultural acceptance of mocking male rape, especially with regards to prison, where people secretly (or overtly) consider it a funny and fitting "punishment" for people who've committed crimes. (And I'm not specifically referring to a comment or two on this thread -- you see this everywhere.) I'm not saying this to be "What about the menz??" but rather to wonder why rape in any context is considered funny. I can't help thinking a lot of people who make those jokes see ALL rape that way -- in fact would rather belittle women as sluts who need a burly man to give them what they deserve -- but they settle for laughing at man-on-man rape because female victims are slightly less fair game to joke about in polite society.

NicoleA, I hear you on the male prisoner rape thing. Like you said, people seem to think prisoners "deserve" it, but you know, NOBODY deserves to be raped, and beliefs like that are part of the continuum of rape culture beliefs. As long as people think a man can "deserve" rape because he broke into a car and got convicted, it will also be acceptable at some level to think that a woman can "deserve" rape for dressing a certain way or drinking.

And also, if the car burglar gets convicted, it probably also means he's black, as white people can commit heinous crimes over and over and never get punished for it, plus we all know that black men are routinely accused of crimes they didn't commit. (A case almost identical to the Stuart one happened in Milwaukee, and I don't doubt there have been many others in other cities, including ones where the truth never came out and a black guy went to jail for a white man's crime and got raped in jail.) Hence, women and black men essentially don't even have to harm another person in order to "deserve" rape.

And in the case of people who really did commit rape or murder and go to jail and most likely get raped, no, those people don't what happens to them either, because as any rational person should know, NOBODY deserves to be raped. Plus, once you start saying that somebody can "deserve" rape, where do you draw the line, how do you decide who does and doesn't "deserve" to be raped? And really, is raping a rapist honestly going to change his behavior, or is it going to make him even more violent? Hell, that's why a lot of violent criminals got that way to begin with, because they were victimized themselves at some point in their lives. Laughing at what happens to them isn't going to change what they did, and it's just going to perpetuate a cycle where violence is routinely minimized and made light of, and in the end it's going to result in a hell of a lot less understanding or concern for all rape survivors.

Just want to add something here.

Not all rapes are physical. Some rapes happen verbally, as well. Examples of verbal rape include anti-choice laws, such as waiting periods and the Human Life Amendment.

"Not all rapes are physical. Some rapes happen verbally, as well. Examples of verbal rape include anti-choice laws, such as waiting periods and the Human Life Amendment."

Aren't those examples of ways to hurt people of the non-rape variety?

I thought rape was forcing someone to have sex against her or his will.

I don't watch SVU that much. One episode I think woke everyone up was "Ridicule." Which is why it is my favorite SVU episode. The fact is that while women are the victims of heterosexual and homosexual rape far more often, men are also victims of female-on-male rape. Men are also laughed at when they report being raped by a woman.

Mina, that is just one way to define rape. Rape is also defined as violating someone physically, verbally, or sexually.

BluePencils - I suddenly understand why people buy treadmills. Do you (other runners on here, too) bring a whistle or one of those personal alarm things?

I carry a flashlight when going out at night, or, during the day, a whistle. I never need it, though - for some reason, I don't get catcalled or harassed.

"Mina, that is just one way to define rape. Rape is also defined as violating someone physically, verbally, or sexually."

Hmm.

"I'm not saying it's right, but I think the difference between saying 'I'm going to rape you' and 'I'm going to kill you' (in a TRULY non-threatening way, not like Delirium's experience) is that rape is more specific, and overwhelmingly a crime against women."

So, is rape more specific than murder? Is it so non-specific that it includes not only forced sex but murder? Is armed bank robbery rape or not, and if not then why not?

Jovan, what you're talking about are metaphors, metaphors that use the concept of rape to describe other events.

It might be useful for you to use the term "rape" when you're actually talking about curtailing rights or whatever, but I find it pretty offensive.

It undermines the impact on real victims of real rape when it is used to describe things that are not rape.

Maybe you could think about that next time you go to call anti-choice laws "rape".

"once you start saying that somebody can "deserve" rape, where do you draw the line, how do you decide who does and doesn't "deserve" to be raped? And really, is raping a rapist honestly going to change his behavior, or is it going to make him even more violent? Hell, that's why a lot of violent criminals got that way to begin with, because they were victimized themselves at some point in their lives."

"It undermines the impact on real victims of real rape when [the term 'rape'] is used to describe things that are not rape."

Just wanted to chime in saying that I strongly agree with these statements. Kudos, anorak and ponies and rainbows.

I'm embarrassed to say that I don't always carry a whistle--I have them in the pockets of my running jackets, but I obviously don't wear them in this kind of weather. I do usually have my cell phone, which has the local police department--not 911--on speed dial. (The local precinct will respond faster and more accurately around here.) Most days, I run very early in the morning, although if I screamed, most likely someone would hear me in this suburban neighborhood. And I don't want to sound arrogant, but I'm not exactly an easy target, I'm 6' tall and muscular. Although I know I'm not as strong as a man and that my best bets if attacked are screaming, running, and getting help. And I have to give props to Nike, who often include a whistle with purchases of women's running gear. It's why I have several of them.

In my first semester of college, I was harassed pretty much every single day. I had to take the bus home from school, so I guess that made me really vulnerable. People would howl and bark at me as they drove past me at the bus stop. People hit on me on the bus and didn't stop after I said I already HAD a boyfriend. People would whistle. People would shout. Mexican workers just stared at me when they drove by, and they're all over my neighborhood so I'm not trying to be racist, b/c they were a common issue. Two teenage boys whistled and called out to me when they were stopped at a light and I had to walk across the crosswalk in front of them. So I flipped them off. I often debated whether carrying a bag of rocks would be a good idea, so I could chuck them at all the drivers who honked or yelled. I hate honking, now. It startles me and makes me depressed. I get really pissed over car horns. And I have social anxiety disorder, so being harassed every day hasn't exactly made me like public places any more...

What pisses me off is that they did it to me when I was in no way looking for attention or dressed in a certain way...and it's so true that they will do it to just anyone. I could be butt ugly with no makeup, hair frizzy, and wearing jeans and a sweatshirt and they'd STILL scare the shit outta me by speeding by and howling. It was so infuriating! I was never able to walk and enjoy the outdoors...

"Like you said, people seem to think prisoners "deserve" it, but you know, NOBODY deserves to be raped, and beliefs like that are part of the continuum of rape culture beliefs"

Ditto. I flinch whenever people joke about "getting what they deserve" etc etc

WHY is this funny?? If I got a chance I would shoot in the head each man who raped my mother, irregardless of their current circumstance (family, friends)... But I would still save them from being raped if I could. Because no one deserves this!

It's not that I think that prisoners "deserve" to be raped, but I think it's one of the last things about rape culture that needs to be addressed.

What irks me about the so-called prison rape "crisis" is that only an estimated 21% of male prisoners are pressured (note that a lot of these statistics don't even specify "forced") while they're incarcerated--by the most liberal estimates (Google it).

Compare that to the number of WOMEN in mainstream society who are raped (or "pressured" if we want to use the same terms as some of the official government surveys)... The sad truth is that we're in more danger just walking to the damned grocery store than they're in when they're in prison.

I don't think that rape is ever a laughing matter or that anyone deserves it. However, so long as incarcerated men are statistically safer than women in the general population, I don't feel too terrible about the fact that they're simply but into OUR shoes for a few years.

21%? One in five? That's a huge number. One in five prisoners are 'pressured' for sex? That's like an epidemic.

Yeah, Delirium.
I guess I get what you're saying, but two wrongs don't make a right.

Is it possible that changing prison culture might in turn affect change in the outside world?

--One in five? That's a huge number.--

Compared to...what is it...one in three women? Makes you sick, when a man locked up with other violent men is statistically safer than a woman in the general population.

One in three women have been raped or one in three women have been 'pressured' for sex? I can believe it if it is the latter, but the former would seem high. If you have the statistics handy, point me to a site and I'll look at them.

In the meantime, I agree that we need to seriously look at the issue of sex in prisons. Rape needs to be prosecuted as a crime, even when committed on people society doesn't value (like prisoners... and women). Incarceration cannot imply consent, or a loss of one's right not to be attacked. Predators can't get the idea that there is ever a time when that behavior is condoned. Not ever.

I definitely think that prison culture plays into a larger culture of aggression and violence, and it needs to be stopped.

I'm sorry, it's one in four.

"1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually assaulted by age 18"

http://www.pcar.org/about_sa/stats.html

In regard to male prison rape...it's just an extension of the rape culture we already contend with. Men in prison are raped because, as there are no women in men's prisons to establish hierarchy over, men take other men as 'bitches,' essentially making women out of the men deemed lesser than the dominent men. As part of rape culture is that only woman can be raped (part of why there's always the 'what about the menz-raped-by-women' that happens too! in these discussions, even though less than 1% of rapes are committed by women), male prison rape is a way of establishing the outside world order inside of the prison.

So...I see it as a symptom, a side-effect, of our already insanely rape-inclined culture, not part of the cause. Let's face it, if there were women and children in the prison with men, they'd be the ones raped. Which is why prisons are segregated based on biological sex.

One in four girls--BY age 18. Something closer to one in three, life-long--and that's just counting the ones who report it.

I'm thinking about all my female friends and my family members, and I'm pretty sure that every single one of them has been sexually assaulted, coerced, or raped. I know that it's not 100%, all across the board, but when I consider that I know SO many womyn (myself included!) who were raped, I just really have trouble feeling sorry for the one-fifth of incarcerated men who have to deal with something that it seems a majority of us deal with on a routine basis. (Does anyone know ANY women who have never been "pressured" into sex?)

I didn't report it when I was raped because I had been drinking and I was 19. I was actually so worried about getting arrested for drinking and using a fake ID, that I didn't report it. I know several other women who had similar situations... So the thirty percent who report it are probably a mere fraction of the actual victims.

I think that, in prison, men feel a need to CREATE women in the absence of actual women. They've spent their whole lives feeling like they have a class of lesser individuals, ready for sexual exploitation at all times... And when they're removed from women, they feel a need to maintain a class that they can dominate and exploit. But even STILL, they're doing less sexual exploitation of each other than they do toward women on a routine basis.

BTW, I just read that the current federal estimate of prison rape is only 11%. That may be a conservative estimate, but it's interesting to note.

While I've never had anyone threaten to rape me before, as I read through all your comments, I find too many similarities between how many of you women-runners are treated.

I rarely run--more of a swimming girl myself, but the behavior that you have described is what I get pretty much every day. It's one of the reasons I carry pepper-spray with me.

It's not as bad as when I was living in Southern California, I used to get followed home at night and pretty much couldn't wear a skirt outside unless I wanted people hanging out of their cars hollering at me.

A few weeks ago, I overheard a group of teenaged boys joking about raping babies and little girls. I've never been so tempted to pepper-spray someone in my life.

BTW, love this blog :)