Via Nerve, I discovered the Vagina Institute (NSFW), a site dedicated to informing you of the myriad ways you can feel insecure about yourself -- then encouraging "vagina enhancement."
Feministing fave the Vagina Lady (source of one of Jess's favorite pics ever) stumbled across this website nearly two years ago. She received some seriously angry emails for suggesting that the Institute, while seemingly pro-vag and pro-woman, is really just about the worst thing ever. A front site for a plastic surgeon, maybe? In any case, the Vagina Institute definitely wants you to hate your body (highlights mine - click to enlarge):
The Vagina Lady had an appropriate response:
I bet the semi-literate prick who penned this has something unsightly about his wanker, some deformation of angle or curvature, the pulsing flaw of a too-prominent vein, an offensive variation in skin tone, an asymmetricality of the glans, perhaps simply an inadequacy of size… or perhaps just the dull ache of an unsatisfied penis, and the empty blackness in his heart, made all the more prominent by his long lonely nights when none of his vagina models would go home with him, not even one with labial deformation.
Well said. If all the Institute's vag-hating depressed you as much as it did me, cheer up by checking out photos of the Vagina Lady's roadtrip. Or buy yourself something nice.
UPDATE: It looks likely the Institute is selling books and info about DIY "vagina enhancement", not actual surgery -- kind of like the female equivalent of penis enhancement spam. Gross.
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I agree with the vagina lady, he probably has one of those screwed up circumcisions that make him pee funny.
Besides, the plastic surgeons can reconstruct/fix everything on our body, why shouldn't they try to fix our womanhood?
No wonder we have such a big problem with women being ashamed of their bodies and the word "vagina."
I agree--the best response to this krep is to remind women to view their lady parts primarily as sources of pleasure for the lady, and never, ever, at all in terms of how they look to some dude, deformed weiner or no. "Vagina enhancement" is the stupidest idea ever (it's like "sunrise enhancement" or "Mozart enhancement"), but the idea that some women may actually be looking at this is unspeakably depressing.
I would think a big clue that this is a blatantly anti-woman because that horrendous "DIY vagina enhancement" page features numerous images of sultry, naked women. Especially the cover image, where the woman is baring her rear end - what the heck does that have to do with my vagina?
Holy crap I wished I hadn't clicked that link. That is so depressing. Who the hell would want a scalpel near their who-who dilly? (South Park y'all, since we're on the theme of cutesy names for vaginas)
And if a dude or woman is going to freak out over how your genitals look then maybe you SHOULDN'T BE FUCKING THEM. Are they paying thousands of dollars for reconstructive surgery to not be an asshole?
First it was breasts and now it's come to this. What the fuck is up with trying to make women's sexual organs conform to a standard someone made up. Though I really like how he took the "people like symmetry" and twisted it for this.
And I absolutely can't stand when someone uses the reasoning, "Well, that's just the way it IS," in order to get people to conform. Guess what, for slaves that was just "the way it was" and they still got pissed and fought for their freedom and then came the women's movement and the civil rights movement because people were tired of "they way it was" so they changed the way.
Just the way it is my ass. It's just the way he wants it to be.
Another odious point against this site. The pictures of "sultry, naked women" moriath pointed out are all taken from porn. In fact, I'm willing to bet anything that ALL the vagina pictures are cropped from porn too.
oh my gosh. At first I laughed at this because it struck me as such a monumental waste of time -- I vote a big fat "who cares??" for this one. But then I realized, shit, there are women who actually get fooled into believing this tripe. So I guess we even have to combat something this stupid and obviously ridiculous.
I mean... I can think of few things less worthy of wasting time on, than how your vagina looks. Far as I'm concerned, my partner can take it or leave it (I feel the same way about penises -- male enhancement pills are a net drain on society. Penis size is low on my list of important considerations in a male partner). But hell, what do I know, I don't even shave for the gyno.
The Vagina Institute is totally disgusting, but I'm not too comfortable with the quote from the Vagina Lady about how the guy's prick must be deformed. Surely it is possible to talk about how ridiculous and inexcusable this whole "ugly vagina" idea is without resorting to a personal attack? I mean I understand the point that the creator of the site is in no position and has no right to talk about ugly genitalia, but I guess I'm just uncomfortable with such a viciously personal angle. Just mho tho.
That institute is . . . wow. Horrifying.
A bit of an aside: Perhaps I'm a language snob, but I also wonder about the credentials of someone who puts up an "informative" website that is so blatantly full of typos, bad grammar, and sentences that don't make any sense. Not that one should need to critiqe the language to see that this site is a bunch of bull, but honestly--if you don't care enough to proofread your website . . .?
The whole trend of vaginal reconstruction and other 'genital enhancement' surgery (for women and men) is incredibly depressing.
New personal favorite for this post: the DIY Enhancement 'quote' about how important vaginal looks are 'because I don't want my PARTNER to feel weird that my vagina is different . . .' WHAT THE HELL??????
I went on the Vag. Institute site and clicked on the 'see how I measure up' feature. Clicking on 'measurements' at random, I got the result that "Your vaginal quality is 53 points. Your vagina is of low quality."
I'm speechless.
"Your vagina is of low quality."
I'm not sure exactly how to do it, but here one should paraphrase Woody Allen: "I never had the wrong kind of orgasm. Even my worst on was just right on the money."
I wonder how that survey "measures up" to the Scientologists' personality test?
I cannot imagine the kind of jackass who, after being allowed to see my vulva, would criticize it. Really. Talk about looking a gift horse in the mouth, so to speak.
This part of the vag goodness test is awesome:
"what is the length of your vagina at ...maximum stretch capacity"
Well, since I've never given birth I dont know, however, i hear the thing can accomodate at 10 POUND BABY you damned moron.
They've clearly mistaken a "stimulated" vagina for an erect penis. It doesnt get longer!!
I just cant believe how stupid this site is. It must just be porn for some really strange person.
From what I understand, the vagina does get longer; the average vagina at rest, so to speak, is only four inches long. But, you know, as you say curious, it stretches to accommodate a penis, a baby, a tampon, whatever. It's not like I can ask a friend to hold one end while I back up--it's not a tape measure!
Wow, I'm just getting more and more grossed out with every comparison I make.
Off topic, but that Anna Nicole Smith ad I'm seeing here and on the front page is pretty tasteless.
Ugh. That crap is just a variation of female genital mutilation to me. It is SOLELY for the benefit of sexual partners and her perceived "marketability".
Well, one difference is that in Africa, some families force their daughters into it. In America, all we have to do is fire up the ol' insecurity-impeller, and women will be lining up to have it done to themselves!
oh dear god! thanks for the heads up. the ad DID NOT look like that when i accepted it. i'm taking it down.
The "Labia Enhancement" people don't seem to understand that the labia and vagina are different things.
(I'm now morbidly curious about the Anna Nicole ad, though I kind of liked Big Anna, trainwreck that she was - I'm weird like that)
It's interesting that the vagina featured in their sidebar diagram of "the female reproductive organ" (though I've heard this crazy rumor that ovulation and gestation take place, you know, somewhere else entirely) includes not only a clitoral hood piercing but a pair of long, French-manicured fingernails. I can't believe I was never informed that those were essential parts of the female reproductive system.
The more I think about, the funnier I think this is, in a kind of sick way. I love the idea that I'm supposed to be so very anxious about my self worth that I'm going to go get a ruler and start measuring my labia. The mental images are just...delicious.
clitoral hood piercing
My vagina just let out a little scream.
Fortunately no one was nearby to hear her. That would've been tough to explain.
It's interesting that the vagina featured in their sidebar diagram of "the female reproductive organ"...includes not only a clitoral hood piercing but a pair of long, French-manicured fingernails.
Not a clitoral hood piercing, mind you, but a "clitoral hood ornament." My clitoris, for example, was made by Toyota.
The "Labia Enhancement" people don't seem to understand that the labia and vagina are different things.
They also don't seem to understand that "labia" is a plural noun. The quiz is all "My labia has some discoloration." "My labia is 2cm long."
It's not like I can ask a friend to hold one end while I back up--it's not a tape measure!
Oh, my. EG, I really needed a laugh today - thanks for that highly amusing image ;)
"Mozart Enhancement." HA!
God, this is disturbing. The whole site seems to be designed to appeal to men, probably hoping that they'll talk their lovers into "fixing" their vagina so that they'll have the ladyparts to match the designer breasts they were pressured into. If any lover, male or female, complained about the lack of symmetry of my labia, it would be time for a throwdown. Seriously.
And I'm glad that someone pointed out the poor writing on the site. Christ. As painful as it was to read, though, there's always the hope that someone will get to the randomly hyphenated "in-fact" and think, "If they can't understand third grade grammar, how can they pretend to understand the female genitals?"
Hope springs eternal. =/
Two things:
What does the picture of the woman presenting her ass to me have to do with labia? Have they moved them and I missed something?
Also: "I never really considered the appearance of my vulva. Until my former partner said it was ugly and constantly commented on it." My boyfriend used to be in charge of the self-help section at a bookstore and therefore I've learned all sorts of disturbing things about what we're selling women who hate their lives. Like, for example, it's always listed as a classic sign of an abusive partner that he tells you your vulva's ugly. Which I didn't even want to believe, and my boyfriend was horrified, but he says he saw it in almost every book on abusive relationships. So, basically, this sight is not only preying on some women's low self-esteem, it's also trying to tell women who are being abused that it's their fault for not being attractive enogh.
Ugh.
um. that's porn.
The domain name contacts seem to live in this very glamourous location:
http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&hl=en&q=5292+south+maryland+parkway,+las+vegas&ie=UTF8&z=19&ll=36.094154,-115.136614&spn=0.000964,0.002344&t=k&om=1
erinjean, you're right, but it is really really really weird porn. The fact that there are so many survey questions has me imagining that some kind of perverted statistician has set the entire thing up as a means to collect the data he finds to be so erotic.
Oh baby, your labial length is within the second standard deviation from the mean of all women who participated in this survey!
Okay, I think this is my personal favorite: "Vaginas can cause public embarrassment when you least expect it. Some embarrassment can occur at any time, from the moment you are making love to the point when you are out shopping." I don't know how many times I've had to tell my vagina to stop embarrassing me in the grocery store! It's nice to know somebody understands my plight...finally.
Is this site supposed to be porn under the guise of science? Or help?
Because it fails miserable at the last two. I can imagine tha the only purpose a site like that would serve is as porn (and shitty porn, at that) or just an attempt at making women feel bad for something they can't help. Or both.
So what if a woman's twat doesn't look aesthetically pleasing to some people. These bastards (bastard?) are implying that it makes her less of a woman, and less of a person. That it makes her less worthy of respect, intimacy and pleasure. Of course, people that perpetrate such bullshit probably don't care about a woman as a person enough to respect her anyway, and certainly aren't likely to care if she derives any intimacy or pleasure from sex.
Law Fairy: Shave for the gyno? I figured that doctors knew about the hair.
And Shannon: I also cannot fathom how my vagina could embarrass me "in public!" My husband and I once drew a comic strip about "the man with unruly hair" (it insulted passers-by) -- just imagine having an unruly vagina. "Hey, who said that??"
When I went through a pube-shaving phase, I was always embarassed to see the gynecologist when I was bare (or worse - pubic five o clock shadow). Go figure.